


That Pretty Little Liar

by tina_v



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Age Difference, Aged-Up Character(s), Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Anxiety Attacks, Consensual Underage Sex, Explicit Language, M/M, Minor Violence, Slow Burn, Underage Peter Parker
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2019-01-29
Packaged: 2019-07-25 07:38:19
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 29,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16193051
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tina_v/pseuds/tina_v
Summary: A lie, even the smallest one, can have the same effect as throwing a pebble in a quiet pond.That day Tony showed up at May’s wasn’t the first time Peter had met Mr. Stark. But the circumstances in which they did first meet... are complicated at best. How are they going to handle what happened now that they have to work together?





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Ok... first time ever writing Starker, so please go easy on me. A shout out btw to @rubberupandmakeitstarker for being sort of a beta reader and such an encouraging and kind human being! xx
> 
> Also, more chapters coming soon so if you enjoy the story, keep an eye on it!
> 
> Here goes nothing. It’s all yours folks, enjoy.

“Hey can I get a coke, please?”

The waiter looked at him funny.

“Want that coke with something?”

Peter wiggled in his chair and flashed a shy smile.

“No, I’m fine. Thanks.”

The guy wrote something down quickly on his pad and left.

The fight with May had just been exhausting. He was ready to stop thinking about it but the conversation played in his head over and over again and every time it did he got even angrier. He knew his aunt wasn’t trying to make his life miserable, but damn it she could take something small and just go around it a hundred times until it blew completely out of proportion.

It all just started as a simple comment on him being really messy lately - true, in fact, he didn’t recall his room ever being in such bad shape - but he was going through a lot lately. Not that he could tell May, obviously. ‘Hey, I was bitten by this weird ass spider and now I can climb walls and shit’ was not something you tell your aunt, even if she’s the most understanding adult ever.

She’d freak out and take him to the hospital and stuff like that and he was having a hard time understanding what the hell was going on as it was. He didn’t even remember how the discussion had escalated so much, but he knew he had to leave before he’d say something he would later regret. So he grabbed his jacket, put on his earphones and just left the apartment leaving behind a very mad aunt May inside. He sighed.

Peter took out his phone and cringed at the screen showing twelve unanswered calls from his aunt, knowing instantly that he was going to be in a lot of trouble. Going home was something he was definitely not looking forward to. He checked his messages.

_‘Had to get out of the house. Meet me here if you can’_

_*Location*_

He knew Ned had received it, but he hadn’t texted back yet. He sighed deeper, sticking his phone back in his pocket. For the first time since he had entered the bar, he took a good look around. There were a couple of guys sitting on stoles at the bar and the rest of the tables were empty except for a young couple making googly eyes at each other and holding hands over shared a burger and some fries.

First time he looked, he almost missed him.

There was another table, very poorly lit, right next to the bathroom and there was a guy sitting there. He couldn’t make out his face because of the lighting but he could see the very expensive shoes and a equally expansive watch wrapped around his wrist. It was obviously a guy grasping that short glass almost empty with a couple of ice cubes. And the vibes he got were just mesmerizing, intimidatingly powerful.

His phone vibrated loudly.

_‘Sorry man, can’t. What r u doin there anyway?’_

Fuck. He didn’t really pay too much attention to Ned’s text because his attention was still focused on the man in the dark.

The waiter approached the table and replaced the glass with a new one filled with brown liquor and after a second of hesitation, he bent slightly and leaned in towards the man, who apparently whispered something in his ear. He nodded and left.

There was something about that man, something vaguely familiar although he couldn’t quite tell what it was. The motion of his hand, the movements he could appreciate in the shadows. He kept thinking he had seen them before, but couldn’t tell where.

“Here’s your coke” his thoughts were abruptly interrupted by the waiter putting down the glass on the table.

He started to reach for his wallet to pay for the drink when he stopped him waving his hand dismissively.

“It’s already paid for”

Peter frowned, confused.

“By who?”

“The gentleman at that table” he answered, moving his head slightly towards the mystery man sitting at the poor lit booth.

Although Peter was taken aback by it, he nodded politely and returned his attention to the figure in the dark.

As the waiter left he clearly saw the mystery man’s hand raise the small glass in his direction and then watched it disappear in the shadows as he assumed he was taking a sip.

Peter felt a shiver go down his spine and definitely not in a bad way. He awkwardly raised his hand back and brought the glass to his lips with a tight, shy smile.

He had known for some time now that he was attracted to men but he was still trying to figure out what the hell was going on in his head. He liked girls; he knew that, for sure. There was this girl at school, Liz, and he had a serious crush on her. But then... that spread on GQ came to his mind. Perfectly ironed suit, that white shirt with the first three buttons open showing just enough to make you wonder what was beneath it, legs confidently spread, leaning back on that leather chair like he didn’t give a single fuck. And surrounded by a neatly sculpted beard: a cocky, arrogant, defiant and impossibly sexy grin.

Suddenly something clicked in Peter’s mind and he felt his stomach drop to the floor a thousand miles per hour.

It couldn’t be him. Not a chance in the world that was him.

He could feel his breath speeding up as he scrutinized the mysterious figure. The posture, the luxurious clothing...

Oh God no, he was getting _hard_ just imagining the possibility. He moved uncomfortably in his chair looking away, trying to talk some sense into himself. That man was ridiculously wealthy, what would he be doing in a crappy little bar in Queens? Without any security of any kind? On the other hand, what security would he need? He was fucking Ir-

And then it happened. The mystery figure raised his hand and motioned for him to come to the booth.

Peter couldn’t breathe. He was gripping his glass so hard that if he didn’t remind himself of his newfound super strength it would easily break. His palms were sweaty, his senses were completely on edge, the noises in the bar, the smell of the food and the drinks and the wooden furniture, the air caressing his skin... all felt a thousand times more intense all the sudden. He hesitated. The man’s hand repeated the movement clearly more impatiently this time.

Peter took a deep breath trying to calm the fuck down a made what was surely a very stupid ass decision, getting up and quickly walking towards the table, holding the drink casually in front of the bulge in his pants as if that way he’d be able to hide it. When he got to the booth, he didn’t really know what to do. Should he sit down? Introduce himself? Thank him for the drink?

Luckily, the mystery man spoke first.

“Well don’t just stand there kid, sit down.”

The _minute_ he heard his voice, Peter knew.

He sat down in front of the guy while internally screaming _omg!omg!omg!OMFG!_

“Hi” his voice came out cracked and high pitched and he just wanted to _die_ at this point. The man leaned over the table as Peter looked up to meet his gaze and _oh lord please help me_ there was absolutely no doubt at this point.

He was sitting across Tony _fucking_ Stark.

“Well, there’s no point in pretending you don’t know who I am since I can see every muscle in you face twitching” he casually commented, leaning back again and looking kind of disappointed.

“Well,” Peter just wanted to evaporate “it’s kind of hard _not_ knowing who you are to be honest.”

“Is that so?” he looked somehow amused.

“Well, um, yeah. You’d have to live in a cave or something.”

Stark raised an eyebrow and contemplated the statement, amused that the kid was oblivious enough to use the sentence ‘living in a cave’ with him of all people.

“Unfortunately, you’re absolutely right.” He took a sip of his drink and looked at Peter. “Well since you do know who I am how about exchanging courtesies?”

Peter opened and closed his mouth a few times, feeling all the blood that wasn’t pooling in his groin go straight to his face.

“I- I am- um...”

“Twelve?”

“No.” He instantly replied, feeling a little hurt “I’m Ned.”

As soon as it came out of his mouth he regretted it. What the _fuck_ , Parker?

“Then it’s nice to meet you, Ned” Stark looked definitely amused. “I trust you’re enjoying your coke?”

“Yes, yes- that was- you shouldn’t have-“

“Can you try and form a complete sentence? It’s incredibly hard to have a conversation while you stutter that much”

Peter released the glass and tangled his hands on his lap trying desperately to regain control of his body.

“I meant, thank you… for the drink. You really didn’t have to.”

“Want to order something a little stronger? I hate drinking by myself.”

Peter panicked.

“Um- well, Mr. Stark- should I? Call you Mr. Stark? - I really can’t...”

“And here I was hoping you had regained the ability to connect words and actually speak” he said, laughing openly now.

Peter lowered his head, feeling his cheeks burn as if they were on fire and Tony noticed.

“Hey, “ he stretched his arm to put a hand on Peter’s shoulder “I’m sorry, I’m just messing with you. You’re under 21, right? Is that it?”

“Yes...” Peter murmured, unable to make eye contact.

“Just out of curiosity, how old _are_ you?” Stark frowned, looking slightly concerned.

“Eighteen” the younger one immediately answered. He couldn’t afford to look even lamer in front of Tony Stark by telling him his actual age. And besides, sixteen... eighteen... what was the difference, really? Two years? Not a big deal.

The man clearly relaxed, although not entirely. He took another sip, as if that would help him ease up.

“So, Ned, how did you end up here?”

Peter flinched a bit at the name but quickly composed himself.

“It- it’s a long story. Needed to get away for a while, you know? Get out of the house...”

Tony arched both his brows and nodded knowingly.

“Believe me, I know the feeling.” He took another sip of his drink and moved the glass in his hand making the ice cubes swirl. “So, eighteen, huh? And what are you majoring in?”

“Um- uh- well, I thought about engineering, although I’m pretty good at chemistry too. Anyway college is not something that bothers me that much these days-“

“Well, it should. You’re almost there.”

“I think I might have different things waiting for me...” Peter desperately wanted to change the subject because all this talk about college could expose him as what he really was, a goddamned high school kid in sophomore year.

“I’m sure whatever you do you’ll be fine, kiddo.” Mr. Stark was sitting sideways in the booth, looking at the bar scene. Peter panicked thinking he was bored out of his mind.

He tried to think, and think fast about a topic that would make Mr. Stark both interested and impressed with him.

“So, have you heard about this thing called nanotech? It’s kind of early still but I’ve read about its medical and technological applications. And, you know, I was thinking about Iron Man- um, like, you know- the armor? And how awesome would it be if it incorporated nanotech somehow?! It would be like, the Swiss knife of the superhero suits.”

As soon as the mumbling speech left his mouth, he _knew_ it was the stupidest thing he had ever said in his life, and to his horror, Tony looked at him startled for a couple of seconds and then burst into laughter.

“You know what, kid? I’ll let you in on something...”

 

They spent what seemed like hours talking about technology, the suits, throwing crazy ideas and brainstorming about impossible weapons and upgrades. And although Peter had panicked at first, the truth was that as soon as Mr. Stark started loosing up a bit, so did Peter, giving him a chance to actually be his enthusiastic and pretty smart self. Tony loved that. In between all the tech talk, he even threw him a couple of compliments like ‘that’s very smart, gorgeous’ and ‘blushed is a good look on you, kid’ that went straight down to Peter’s stomach, creating a warm sensation that kept traveling south. The shear amount of sexual energy Mr. Stark was oozing was unbearable.

At some point he noticed his phone was going crazy in his pocket. He apologized and took it out to look at the screen and immediately panicked.

_‘Peter come back. We have to talk.’_

_‘Peter Benjamin Parker WHERE ARE YOU’_

_‘PICK. UP. NOW’_

_‘Peter I’m not fucking around. ANSWER.’_

_‘Jesus Christ Peter PLEASE. I’m sorry about the fight ok? Just tell me if you’re ok’_

_‘OMG YOU’RE BEING SO DRAMATIC’_

_‘Peter if you’re not here in 20 minutes I AM CALLING THE COPS’_

 

That last text had just been sent, so quickly Peter said he had to get going. It was a school night. Tony offered him a ride home on the way out of the bar and although Peter could have easily walked - or even swung- back, he gladly accepted. Anything that would give him some extra minutes with that man was welcomed. He noticed when he got into the car and gave him the directions that Tony was tipsy, but he looked pretty OK after four glasses of scotch. He _also_ noticed the lingering hand on the small of his back while Stark opened the door for him and motioned him inside.

They talked some more on the way over and Peter could barely resist the urge to reach out his hand and touch him. He was so close, the smell of his cologne, the scotch, the car’s leather upholstery... everything about him was inviting and just unbelievably _sexy_. Peter felt as if he was in a perfume ad.

He finally stopped the car, in a one-way alley right next to Peter’s block.

“Hope you don’t mind but I’d rather not park my car in front of a building at this hour. People love to gossip” Tony said, with a dash of resentment in his voice and a sarcastic smile. Then he sighed. “You know? Sometimes I miss those days where I just did whatever I wanted without any consideration of the consequences. I wonder what happened to that guy...”

“He became Iron Man?” Peter said, practically a whisper.

Tony looked at him from his seat, eyes deeply locked on his.

“I guess he did...”

Peter _knew_ he could go for it. It’s just that feeling you get sometimes, that electricity in the air, the uneven breathings, this invisible magnet just _pulling_ you towards the other person, mouths slightly opened, as if waiting for imminent contact... He was terrified that he was reading the whole situation wrong, but his teenage libido took the reins; he turned on his seat and leaned in to press his lips against Tony’s in a feather light touch. He kept his hands on his lap, avoiding actually touching the older man. At first he thought he had screwed up because Mr. Stark went completely stiff for a second, like he was thinking whether or not this was a good idea, but then he moved forward and brought a hand up to cup Peter’s cheek, slowly moving his lips against the boy’s.

And Peter was just _floating_.

He tried to kiss back, as best as he could, but all he lacked in experience he made up in enthusiasm. The kiss got heated, Peter grasping at Tony’s shoulder like he was holding on for dear life, hips rocking forward looking for something to grind on. He could feel Tony’s breath against his own, his tongue exploring Peter’s lips and mouth confidently. He would take the it from barely a caress of their lips to a suddenly hungry, desperate and sloppy kiss and then back to the soft pecks again. It was driving Peter _insane_ with need and a moan ended up escaping him. His eyes went wide open, mortified, but to his surprise the moan apparently had a very different effect on Tony, who pushed him by the neck forward to slam his lips against Peter’s, _claiming_ his mouth.

At some point Peter just lost all control of his actions, got off the passenger’s seat and climbed on top of Tony, straddling the older man who immediately rested both his hands on Peter’s hips. The following movement was inevitable for both of them. Peter rolled his hips down as Tony pushed his up, pressing down on the kid’s hips and when their very painfully obvious bulges rubbed against each other, neither of them could repress a breathy moan. Peter broke the kiss and nuzzled into Tony’s neck. His spider senses were just overwhelmingly dialed up, the intensity of every feeling completely off the charts and he felt as if he was going to have a fucking heart attack. Tony sensed the discomfort and he ran his hand up and down Peter’s back, trying to soothe him.

“Hey, you ok?” asked Tony in between ragged breaths, his voice low and a bit worried.

Peter took a minute, trying to calm down, his heart still pumping ferociously against his chest as he finally answered.

“Yeah, it was... it’s just... intense.” He was absolutely mortified. Oh God, he couldn’t even pick up the courage to face the man. “I have to go. I’m so sorry.”

And he opened Tony’s door as fast as he could and without even making eye contact, he ran down out of the alley and down the street.

Tony called for ‘Ned!’ a couple of times but Peter never looked back. He couldn’t.


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony discovers the secret identity of Spiderman and when he has no other chance but to confront him, he decides to get some revenge.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As promised, chapter 2! 
> 
> This one was fun to write, because I tried to match it with the exact same dialogue that hey have in the movie. Here's the link to the scene, I suggest you guys watch it after reading this because the expressions on their faces... this could very well be canon if the writers wanted to lol
> 
> Here's the scene: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oCkUyjaZuNI
> 
> Also, this is unbetaed, so it hasn't been proofread by anyone but me so please forgive any mistakes!
> 
> Enjoy and every piece of feedback is highly appreciated.

[A few months later]

 

Tony was back in the compound, in his lab, working on putting the finishing touches on an Iron Man gauntlet disguised as a common wristwatch.

Since the incident with that kid’s mom after the conference at MIT, Tony had tried his best to put some sense into the team. But Steve was being difficult, as usual. God, he really cared about the man, but he could be thick when he wanted to. Such a stiff view on right and wrong, on following the rules… Steve had never seen grey areas anywhere, and suddenly _now_ he decided to start being analytic! The rest of the team did have reservations but everything could be renegotiated and refined after signing the accords, so he was confident he could get them on board.

He did understand Steve’s point of view, though. Damn, the memory of that hearing at the Senate Armed Service Committee back in the day they were trying to take his suit away from him was still fresh in his mind. So was the answer he gave to that piece of shit Stern.

_‘I am Iron Man. The suit and I are one. To turn over the Iron Man suit would be to turn over myself which is tantamount to indentured servitude or prostitution depending on what state you’re in. You want my property, you can’t have it!’_

He smiled to himself. Geez, how much had he enjoyed pissing that bastard off way back before anyone knew he was Hydra trash. But this was different, this wasn’t some greedy government after their suits, this was the United Nations telling them they couldn’t go around the globe vaporizing cities without any control from an official organism whatsoever because _people_ were paying the costs of their mistakes. _His_ mistakes. And the amount of guilt Tony felt after Sokovia was overwhelming enough already to keep adding civilian casualties to the mix.

The accords _had_ to be signed. Period.

He wanted to keep the faith and hope that Steve would come around, but he wasn’t going to put all his chips on that number. So he had been doing some homework lately. Well, not him directly. His minions were doing all the dirty fieldwork. That reminded him…

“F.R.I.D.A.Y, any updates on that spider-guy from NY?”

“Boss, I have compiled 93% of the information you asked for”

Tony raised his head from the table and grabbed his veggie smoothie, facing the screens.                        

“Play it”

The video showed a guy trying to break into a car in the middle of the street when suddenly a red and blue blur shot some sort of thread to his legs and the guy landed face down on the sidewalk. The next clip showed the same red and blue figure swinging from building to building to land in front of a car that had apparently lost control and was heading straight into a city bus. The guy stopped it with his _bare hands_. No armor, no weapon, no shield. _Nothing_.

“Do we have an ID yet?”

“Sir, based on the surveillance reports and your PI’s information, his name is Peter Benjamin Parker, age 16. Currently attending Midtown School of Science and Technology. His home address is listed-“

Tony stopped listening to the AI the moment the pictures popped up on the screen. It was as if he was underwater and everything around him had been muffled. Without getting up, he used his legs to roll the chair and get a closer look at the screen, his head spinning. The same brown-eyed innocent puppy look, same face and hair, roughly the same height and body complexion... _definitely_ not the same name and _absolutely not_ the same age.

That pretty little _lying motherf-_

“- lives with his aunt, whose also his legal guardian, May Parker, in Queens, New York. The majority of his social interactions involve an Edward Leeds, also a student at MSST and member of the Decathlon T-”

“Mute.”

Silence filled the lab when he cut off F.R.I.D.A.Y. as Tony rested his elbows on his knees, running his hands through his hair. He pursed his lips to prevent loud ‘FUCK!’ that he was about to let loose. Hiding his face in his hands, he decided not to think about it anymore because he was getting sick to his stomach. And not because the memories from that night repulsed him now that he knew the kid’s actual age, but because they _didn’t_.

Suddenly it all came back at him, hitting him like a wave. The shy smile, the pink flushed cheeks, the rapid breaths, that look... like he worshiped him. Like a lost puppy rescued from a pound that would follow him wherever he decided to go. So tempting, so smart, so cute…

And, as of now, _so fucking sinful and wrong._ Just  _wrong._

Too many unanswered questions starting popping up in his head, his mind going a thousand miles per hour. Why had he lied? Why had he _believed_ him? Did he _know_ it was a lie and just subconsciously went with it? Was he a horrible human being? The answer was probably yes although it had nothing to do with this particular matter. Then a whole different question created a hole in his stomach. What if things with the team escalated? What if it came a moment where he had _no_ chance but to call him in?

 He stood up, suddenly feeling trapped and out of breath. He knew the feeling as soon as it hit him. Fucking anxiety. He started to walk around the room, pacing, trying to talk to his mind, ordering it to just _stop._ He knew the more he’d pay attention to the feeling, the stronger it would get and the harder it would be to breathe. He took a deep breath and as he exhaled, he tapped himself in the chest where the arc reactor used to be. 1, 2, 3. And again, breathed in deep, 1, 2, 3. He kept pacing the room and doing the breathing exercise until the weight on his chest lifted slightly.

He needed air, like the air in the room wasn’t enough. He opened every door and window in the lab and let the air just flow through the room

“Unmute. Call Rhodey” he ordered, closing his eyes while straightening up and trying to compose himself.

A few seconds later, his pal’s face appeared on the screens.

“Hey, Tony, what’s up?”

“Hey Rhodes, listen, I found that spider dude from New York-“

“The one from the YouTube videos?”

 “Yeah. Turns out he’s a fucking high school kid from Queens.”

 “Damn” Rhodey sounded disappointed. “Well, we can’t recruit a fifteen year old-“

 “Sixteen.” Tony immediately corrected him, way too fast and way too loud.

 “Are you _crazy_?” It seemed very unlikely by the alarmed sound of his voice that Rhodes was going to be on board with his. “What difference does it make? Fifteen or sixteen, he’s a kid, Tony. We can’t recruit a _kid_.”

 Tony cringed visibly at that word.

 “What if we don’t have a choice? What if _Cap_ doesn’t give us a choice?”

 He heard his friend sigh on the other end of the line.

 “We’ll deal with that when and if it happens, okay? Let’s just hope it doesn’t come to that.”

 He sighed too, but because deep down he already knew the answer. “Yeah, let’s hope.”

 

————

 

Peter walked out of the elevator, nodding slightly with the rhythm of the music blasting through his earphones. As he walked through the corridor, he took the keys from the back pocket of his jeans and opened the apartment door.

 “Hey May,” he said without really looking for his aunt, leaving the DVD player on the table and throwing his backpack on the floor.

 “Oh, hey! How was school today?” he heard her ask from the living room.

 “Okay” then Peter remembered as he turned to face her. “There’s this crazy car parked outside-“

 His muscles froze in utter panic and his lunch ran a race up his throat. He could feel all the blood from his face _drain_ , an ice-cold sensation expanding throughout his skin.

 What the _fuck?_

Tony Stark was sitting in his couch. He was in his living room. Sitting next to his _aunt_. Having some sort of absurd, surreal, sick _tea party_ _?_

 So many questions, so many terrible scenarios quickly formed in Peter’s mind. How had he found him? Why was he here? Had he discovered that he’d lied that night and he had told May? Oh my God, _what_ had he told May?

 “Oh, Mr. _Parker_.” He said casually, after inspecting the piece of cake in his hand, he turned to him slowly with a knowing, calm, amused look plastered across his face.

 "Um-“ oh God, NO, WHY? “Uh- what?” He folded his arms, and then unfolded them while a nervous laugh escaped his lungs, trying to make them breathe again. “What are you do-?” He extended his hand in an attempt to introduce himself, then realized how stupid that was, so he put his hands in his pockets to stop all the insecure movements that were just embarrassing “Hey, I’m- I’m- I’m Peter”

 It didn’t help that Tony hadn’t moved a single muscle and still had that exact same expression plastered across his face as he answered.

 “Tony.”

It was almost like… was he mocking him? Peter closed his arms across his chest, getting defensive.

 “What’re you- what’re you- what are you doing here?” The question tried to be casual but he was so tense he stuttered embarrassingly and his voice kept cracking and coming off high pitched.

 " _And here I was hoping you had regained the ability to connect words and actually speak”_

Tony’s words from that night along with his laughter hit him like a slap across the face.

As if May could read his mind, she mouthed a very clear, very obvious although soundless ‘what the fuck?’ when their looks crossed paths.

 “It’s about time we met” he said that with a crooked smile that screamed sarcasm, leaving no doubt whatsoever that he was _very_ aware that they had already met. “You’ve been getting my emails, right?” And then he winked weirdly fast so that May couldn’t see him.

 “Yeah... yeah. Regarding the, eh-“ Peter decided right there, at that very moment in his life, that he would _never_ try improv, ever, because he totally sucked at it. And what the hell did he mean by that? Emails? He didn’t even give him his real name that night!

 “You didn’t tell me about the grant” luckily aunt May jumped in and saved the day.

 “About the grant!”

 “The September Foundation. Remember you applied?” Mr. Stark asked, finally being of some help by rejoining the conversation.

 “Yeah…” _Um, absolutely not?_

 “I approved! So now,” he said, raising his tea mug “we’re in business.” And as he took a long sip, he _glared_ at Peter and turned away, looking like he was enjoying this way too much than he had to.

 Aunt May looked shocked to say the very least.

 “You didn’t tell me anything. What’s up with that? Are you keeping secrets from me now?”

 That did regain Mr. Stark’s attention. He was obviously toying with him, that sexy _bastard._ Was this revenge of some sort? He probably deserved it. Peter quickly jumped to offer an explanation.

 “I just- I just know how much you love surprises, so I thought I would let you know…” _that I hooked up with a forty-something year old man in an alley. Oh and that I’m probably gay. Or bi. I don’t know! Surprise?_ “Anyway, w-what did I apply for?”

 “That’s what I’m here to hash out” Tony looked directly at Peter and suddenly his smiled turned devious. “You know, it’s so hard for me to believe she’s somebody’s aunt.”

 May immediately looked down, amusingly flattered. She looked slightly flushed when she answered. “Well, they come in all shapes and sizes, you know?”

 And Tony had not looked at May _once_ as she responded _,_ his eyes glued to Peter’s and _still_ grinning at him.

What the fuck was he doing? Was he _flirting_ with her to mess with him? Peter furrowed his brows.

 “This walnut bake loaf is... exceptional.”

 Well, that was _enough_.

 “Let me just stop you there.” For the first time since he had entered the room, he didn’t stutter. Tony already seemed far too pleased with himself; he was _not_ going to watch while he put the moves on May in front of him. “Is this grant, like, money involved or whatever...? No?”

 “Yeah, it’s pretty well founded.” Then his tone definitely changed, a much more imperative ring to it. “Look who you’re talking to.”

Oh, he knew very well whom he was talking to. And it seemed as if Tony wanted to remind him _exactly_ whom he was talking to. Peter gulped as Stark turned to May.

“Can I have five minutes with him?”


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony and Peter have a little talk about this mysterious 'Spiderman'... among other things.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey loves! Thank you SO much for all your comments, they mean the world to me and I promise I'll always answer every single one of them, even if sometimes it takes me a while <3
> 
> It's been a few days without updates but I have chapter four in the bag too! Yay! So expect an update quite soon, I'm just gonna give you guys a bit of time to read this one.
> 
> As always, hope you enjoy this and all feedback is appreciated (constructive, please lol)
> 
> xx

Tony shut and locked the door, his eyes fixated on the boy as he did so.

Peter was glued to the floor. The look on Mr. Stark’s face was _fiercely_ predatory, like a lion hiding in the bushes while calmly watching the movements of a poor, unaware zebra. He secretly wished Tony would just close the distance between them and kiss him and he almost thought his fantasy was coming to life when Mr. Stark moved forward… only to pass right by him and spit out the piece of cake on the garbage. Peter noticed he’d been holding his breath all this time.

“As walnut bake loafs go, that wasn’t bad,” he stated and then took a chance to look around. “Oh, what do we have here, some retro tech, huh? Thrift store? Salvation army?”

He turned around to face the kid and then he realized: he was alone, with the kid, in a locked bedroom. Not the greatest idea ever, now that he fully considered the situation.

“Uh… the garbage, actually” Peter looked confused and expectant. And Tony found that gorgeous.

“You’re a dumpster diver” although he did not let the expression reach his face, he was smiling inside.

“Yeah, I was...” the kid looked just completely lost by then and looked at him with apologetic puppy-eyes. “Look, um… I _definitely_ did not apply for your grant, so if this is about that night-”

“Uh, uh! Me first” he took out his pad trying to keep a calm, composed look although everything he cloud really think of after the kid mentioned _that_ was pulling him close and- _Tony, don’t_. _You’re not here for this._ “Quick question of the rhetorical variety…” he motioned to played the footage, savoring his little moment of revenge “that’s _you_ , right?”

Peter’s blood froze instantly for the second time that day. So _that’s_ why he was here, the Spiderman video on YouTube. For a second he was relieved but at the same time, he also couldn’t help but feel slightly disappointed that this had nothing to do with that night… And then the reality of the situation came crushing down on him.

Mr. Stark _knew_ he _was_ Spiderman.

He folded his arms over his chest again, getting defensive.

“Uh- No, no…”

Tony flipped the screen and pretended he hadn’t heard his blatant lie.

“Look at you go” although what he really wanted to say was look at you _still lying_ to me. “Wow, nice catch! 3000 pounds, 40 miles per hour? It’s not easy,” he said as he turned off the device. “You’ve got _mad_ skills…”

With a quick glare at the boy and a completely intentional frown in his face, Tony left no doubt that he wasn’t referring _only_ to the skills that were shown on the clip.

Peter blushed fiercely.

“That's all-That's all on YouTube though right?” he turned around trying to concentrate on something else. _Anything_. “I mean that's where you found it. Cause' you know that's all fake. It's all done on a computer? ”

Tony was ready to grab the kid by the shoulders and shake him. Was he seriously playing dumb with him? It was both infuriating and hot at the same time. He suddenly noticed the small trap door on the ceiling. _Well, that was easy,_ he thought to himself as he grabbed a stick.

“Yeah, yeah. You mean, like, those UFOs over Phoenix?” he said as he lifted the stick and pushed, making the kid’s ‘suit’ fall down hanging by a string. “What have we here?”

Peter moved with surprisingly fast and fluent, grabbing the suit and throwing it into the closet. He tried to say something but he couldn’t come up with an excuse for that so he just leaned over his side against the closet, casually trying to keep his cool. 

And Tony decided he was done playing games with the kid. He approached him slowly, as if he was stalking a prey – and he kind of felt like he was – because he knew the closeness would intimidate Peter. And he was right.

Peter’s breath starting to come in irregular puffs, as Tony got closer, a serious look on his face. The kid was right there, in front of him, like a deer caught in headlights. So innocent and nervous… such an easy target.

“So, you’re the Spider…ling. The crime-fighting spider? Spider boy?”

That _boy_ felt like a kick right in the nuts. That’s how Tony saw him now that he knew who he really was? A _boy?_ Peter looked down, the room getting smaller and smaller by the minute.

“Spider _man_ ” he corrected him with what was barely a whisper, feeling like the biggest fool on Earth.

“Not it that onesie, you’re not” Tony turned around and added sarcastically.

Well, that was just _mean_ and unnecessary. _Yeah, well, you wanted to get into that onesie not that long ago,_ Peter thought, but he quickly stopped himself from saying it out loud. Instead, he decided he wasn’t going to let the big rich man intimidate him. Nuh-uh, he was going to stand his ground and wouldn’t let him treat him like a baby.

“It’s not a _onesie_.” He walked away, feeling hurt.

“Who else knows? Anybody?” Tony took the chance to grab the suit from the closet and take a better look at it.

“Nobody…”

“Not even your unusually attractive aunt?” the man asked as he sat down, inspecting the piece of clothing.

The boy flinched, sensing a wave of jealousy flow through him form a familiar knot in his stomach. His tongue was already in motion before his brain could stop it.

“Do you _really_ find her attractive or are you just trying to get back at me?”

Peter regretted it as soon as he said it. Tony looked up at him; brows sky high and he narrowed his eyes while he leaned forward with a piercing, dangerous look.

“And _why_ would I want to get back at you _exactly?_ ”

He was challenging him, Peter could tell. The silence was awkward and heavy, like the air had gotten denser and it was getting harder to breathe. Tony looked pissed and amused at the same time, his eyes still fixated on the boy’s, a clear warning in the look he was giving him: _don’t you dare, kid_. Peter opened and closed his mouth a few times, but nothing came out.

“You know what I think is really cool?” Tony broke the silence, returning his attention to the suit as if nothing had happened. He grabbed the tiny tube with the web fluid and threw it at Peter, who easily caught it in his hand. “This webbing. Tensile strength is off the charts. Who manufactured them? ”

“I did” he threw the flask back into the closet.

“I see… so the part about you being good at chemistry _was_ true.”

Tony watched with pleasure how the kid’s face turned bright red, eyes never leaving the desk. He knew it was mean of him to tease him like that, but damn it, the boy deserved it.

“I- I’m… I’m sorry-”

“Climbing the walls... How are you doing that? Cohesive gloves?” Tony cut him off and kept examining the suit. Peter looked in horror when Mr. Stark put the goggles over his eyes. “Lordy! Can you even _see_ in these? Uhhh- I’m blind!”

Mortified, Peter quickly walked over to Tony and just snatched away the suit from his face.

“I can- I _can_ see in those, okay?” he took a deep breath. “It's just that... when... whatever happened, happened, it's like my senses have been dialed to eleven.” He gave Tony a meaningful look as he walked towards the bed and sat, head down in shame. “Sometimes… there's _way_ too much input. They just kinda help me focus...”

Tony caught the look and immediately recalled that night on the car. Peter being so shaky, his heart pounding like he had just run a marathon, moaning and being overly sensitive at the lightest of touches…

_“Hey, you ok?”_

_“_ _Yeah, it was... it’s just... intense.”_

Well, that explained the running away part. The kid was just literally overwhelmed with feeling.

“Why are you doing this?” Although what Tony really wanted to ask was why _did_ you do it? Why did you sat at the booth, why did you lie about the age, why did you get into the car? What is it about me that makes you look at me like _that_? “I got to know. What's your MO. What gets you out of that twin bed in the morning? ”

Peter sighed, looking up at Tony with a sad expression of resignation on his face, like the one someone a lot older than him who knows he has a huge responsibility resting on his shoulders would have.

“When you can do the things that I can, but you don't... and then the bad things happen, they happen because of you.”

Tony didn’t let it show, but the kid’s answer hit him right home. He remembered the vision he’d had at Strucker’s lair in Sokovia… Cap, Nat, Bruce, Thor, Clint: all of them, dead. Cap’s words at his feet…

 _‘You… could have… saved.. us’_.

A shiver ran down his spine. He remembered that feeling of having to _do_ something about it, something to prevent it from happening, because he knew that if it ever came to pass, it’d be his fault for having the resources and a chance to take action but then fail to do anything to stop it. Not a feeling or a thought that a typical sixteen year old should have, though, to be fair, this was no regular sixteen year old, anyway. This kid… he really was something else. 

“So you wanna look out for the little guy. You wanna do your part. Make the world a better place all that, right?”

Peter took a deep breath, like he had been waiting for Tony’s answer to do it.

“Yeah, yeah… Just looking out for the little guy.”

Tony knew that the kid could handle a fight if it came to that, and he also knew that none of the others would go too far or too hard on him. They were making the wrong decisions but they weren’t monsters. Well, except for that deranged, soviet Chucky doll, Barnes. He stood up and walked over the bed. He could _hear_ Peter’s heart pounding against his chest like a hummingbird and thought it was incredibly sweet how every time he got slightly close, the kid just went nuts.

“I’m gonna sit here, so you move the leg” Peter clumsily made room for him, embarrassed. Tony landed a hand on his shoulder and relished when he felt every single muscle in the kid’s body go rigid. “Got a passport?”

Peter turned to face him and he immediately regretted it. He was _way_ too close. He could feel the heat of his _breath_ against his skin. They locked eyes and, oh god, it was intense. He was instantly reminded of the car, that moment they’d just stared at each other, waiting for one of them to take the leap.

“Um- I don’t…” he was way too tense to beat himself up for stuttering. “I don’t even have a driver’s license-”

“Ever been to Germany? You’re gonna love it.” Tony’s voice had become a whisper. A very sexy, low key whisper.

“What...?” Peter felt lightheaded. They were both slowly leaning towards each other without actually realizing what they were doing. He couldn’t help but look at the man’s lips through half lidded eyes. Mr. Stark was so close... “I- I can’t go to Germany” he could feel Tony’s breath over his lips. “I... I’ve got homework…”

And right there, that was the moment Tony was reminded that, despite all his smarts, logic and special abilities, this was _in fact_ a sixteen year old. He quickly backed away when he realized how close he’d been to make a mess. Again.

“I’m going to pretend you didn’t say that” he barely controlled the urge to roll his eyes as he got off the bed.

Peter almost fell forward. He quickly composed himself, feeling incredibly frustrated that the older man had pulled away at the very last second. He tried to sound normal, but it was obvious in his voice that he was exasperated.

“I’m serious! I can’t just drop out of school-”

“Might be dangerous” Tony went for the door knob, “better tell Aunt Hottie I’m taking you-”

Peter rose to his feet like the bed was on fire and shot a web right over Mr. Stark’s hand, gluing him to the door. Tony looked at him like he had just slapped him.

“… Don’t tell aunt May” he warned him, raising a finger in his direction.

And for the first time since they’d had that conversation about tech in the bar, Tony looked at him almost like he was… _impressed._ Peter felt a rush of confidence shoot through him until Stark dismissively motioned towards the door.

“Get me out of this.”

“Oh… Um- yeah, just a sec…” Peter rushed to the table, looking for a pair of pliers to peel the web off the door.

He approached Tony and without meeting his eyes, he kneeled at his feet and started working, very careful to avoid his hand, pulling hard at the threads.

“Mr. Stark?”

“Yes, kiddo?”

Peter wanted to ask so many things.

He looked up at the man he so desperately adored, his eyes begging for a sign that would indicate that the moment they’d just shared wasn’t just a result of his overexcited teenage mind and he really wanted him too. He wanted a sign that he could get up, grab the back of his neck and kiss him senseless while he was still pinned against the door. He wanted to know he wouldn’t push him away, that he would return the kiss just as hungrily as he had the night they met. He wanted to ask if he could touch him, _everywhere_ , and tell him he wanted to be touched by him too, in ways no one had ever touched him before. He needed to know if Tony’s memories were as fresh as his. Like that moment Peter was on top of him and he grabbed him by his hips and pushed down. He wanted to tell him that since that day, whenever he touched himself _that_ was all he could think of, splayed on his bed, arching his back like a cat with his hand down his underwear. He wanted him to know how many times he’d come undone in that very same bed they’d just been sitting on, imagining it was Tony’s hand instead of his own and moaning ‘ _Mr. Stark_ ’ softly over and over again until he’d come, a tear or two falling from the corner of his eyes because the intensity was too overwhelming.

He wanted to tell him, he really did. But the idea of a possible rejection was too devastating…

“Nothing. Never mind…” and he focused on his task, quietly kicking himself for being such a coward.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the battle at the airport in Berlin, Tony goes to Peter's room to say goodbye before he flies back to NY... and Peter decides it's about time they talk about that night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hola mi gente!  
> Again, as promised, chapter 4.
> 
> WARNING: this chapter is definitely rated R.  
> My way of saying thank you for reading and commenting and being such nice people, patiently waiting for some smut.  
> And also, some angst, beacuse... yeah, life is angst. 
> 
> I'm dying to hear what you guys think of this one. Enjoy! xx

Tony knocked on the door, clearing his throat.

He had just left the hospital. He was flying with Rhodey back to the compound as soon as he was stabilized. After what had happened that day, he just needed some comfort, someone who looked at him like Peter did, because he didn’t feel like he deserved to be looked at like that.

He also realized how incredibly dangerous and irresponsible he had been putting Peter in the middle of all this mess. When he saw him lying on the ground at the airport… not moving… A shiver ran down his spine just remembering how incredibly afraid he’d been. He wanted to give the kid a little pat on the back before he flew him back to New York.

“Just a minute, Happy!” he heard Peter scream.

A second later the door swung open to reveal a very startled Peter in his pajamas.

“Hey, kid. I just wanted to tell you- uh…” He suddenly realized he didn’t really know how to do this or what to say, and he thought the reason could be that he never actually got any compliments growing up. Howard hadn’t been exactly big on those, unless he was fangirling over Steve, obviously. He cleared his throat “Well, good job today. You did great.”

Peter’s eyes gleamed with happiness as he opened and closed his mouth, not really knowing what to say, and Tony could feel his insides melt at the sweet reaction. That kid was pure heart and soul and something so rare and precious had to be protected at all costs.

“Anyway, yeah” the older man broke the awkward silence, trying to get away as fast as he could. “Have a safe flight.”

Tony was already turning around to leave when Peter spoke.

“Mr. Stark! Um- can we,- can I have a word with you? Like, in private?” And he pointed at the room.

Something inside Tony instantly screamed this was a _bad_ idea, but the pleading look on the kid’s face...

“Sure. But make it quick, okay?”

He stepped into the room while Peter closed the door behind him and he was anything but surprised by what he found. The suitcase was open and the clothes were everywhere, there were some half eaten chocolate snacks on the table next to the bed and it was just a complete _mess_. Like a teenage room would have looked like.

The kid caught Tony’s look of reprobation and quickly walked towards the bed, picking up clothes from the floor on his way and piling them up messily on a chair. He turned around to face him.

“Um- Mr. Stark?”

“Yes?”

“I was wondering… Are you- are we ever gonna talk…about _that_ night-“

“There’s nothing to talk about” Tony quickly cut him off. “It never happened.”

To Peter, that felt like a bucket of ice-cold water thrown on his warm skin. And it hurt. So much so that he winced, like the words had physically hit him right in the middle of the chest and stopped his breath.

He watched Tony turn to leave the room and immediately jumped in the air doing a back flip and landed right behind him, straightening his arm and pressing his hand hard to the door, blocking the older man’s way out with a hurt expression on his face.

“To me, it _did_ happen” he said, eyes feeling wet all the sudden.

When he turned around to face him and saw the look on the kid’s face, Tony’s mouth opened slightly, like he wanted to say something but couldn’t find the words. His expression showed sadness and guilt.

“Kid-“

“ _Stop_ calling me that” he took his hand away from the door and it clutched into a fist on his side, his mouth barely moving because of how hard he was clenching his jaw. “If I’m old enough to fight by your side, I’m old enough to be shown some respect” Peter’s tone was firm, angry.

“Look,” Tony put his hands up, as a sign of defeat “I didn’t mean it like that, alright?” He sighed. “Of course it _did_ happen, but it was _wrong_ and it _can’t_ happen ever again.”

Peter’s anger evaporated as Tony’s words sank in, and his expression was replaced with sad concern, suddenly feeling very insecure.

“But... I- uh- I thought you liked it...” that last part came out as barely a whisper, and Peter dropped his gaze at the floor, ashamed.

That went through Tony’s heart like a needle.

“Hey....” he got a little closer but hesitated, unsure of what to do. His primary impulse was to comfort him, touch him, but he didn’t want to send him mixed signals. He put his hand under the boy’s chin and made him meet his eyes. “Peter, that’s not... I _did_ like it. Very much, actually. But you’re sixteen and I’m _forty fucking six_. That’s a _huge_ age difference, kiddo. Not to mention you’re also a minor-“

“I’m a _consenting_ minor-“

“That’s not the point.”

“Then what _is_ the point?”

Damn, the kid was not dropping it and Tony was running out of arguments, patience and self-restraint.

“The point is that the year you were _born_ I was getting drunk off my ass and sleeping around with every-“ he suddenly realized his stories of parties in Switzerland, women and alcohol weren’t exactly kid-friendly. “The point is you’re _sixteen_ and according to New York state laws this is _illegal_ , end of story.”

“Well that- that’s just a bunch of bullshit, Mr. Stark”

Tony’s eyes went wide. “What did you just say?”

“I’m sorry but it is! When you and I- you thought I was eighteen!”

“Yes, an adult”

“That is the _stupidest_ thing I’ve ever heard! Will I change _that_ much in one or two years? What does exactly _make_ me an adult? Are you telling me that by turning eighteen I’ll acquire some sort of special knowledge, become clairvoyant or something?” Peter was frantic, moving his arms around and trying desperately to make his point because, damn it, it was a good point! “I’m still gonna be into you anyway! What difference does it make if it’s now or in two years? The adult _label_?”

Tony shook his head. How could he make him understand?

“Look, it… it’s complicated” Tony realized he was cornered on this.

“I think I can uncomplicate it for you...”

The look on Peter’s face made Tony’s heart race in his chest. It was a determined, sensual look. He moved with the confidence of someone who knows they’ve won a battle. Eyes glued to Tony’s, Peter slipped his hands under the suit’s jacket and laid them on each side of Tony’s torso as he closed the distance between them. Stark looked up in a desperate attempt to regain some sense and the boy took advantage of that, getting dangerously close to his neck.

“Is this ok?” Peter said softly, his lips barely touching the skin right under Tony’s earlobe in feather-like kiss.

Tony closed his eyes, his breath deepening and quickening at the touch.

“You know it’s _not_...” it was barely a whisper, but Peter heard.

“But does it _feel_ good?” And this time, he pressed a proper kiss to Tony’s pulse point and flicked his tongue, lapping at his earlobe.

Tony knew instantly that he _had_ to stop him. Problem was... it did feel _so_ good...

“Yes...” he could feel the older man loosening up, slowly giving in.

“I want to- I want to make you feel good, _Mr. Stark_...” Peter whispered in his ear, his voice cracking with overpowering desire.

“Jesus, kid...”

And he lost it. Tony totally lost it. He grabbed Peter’s hips with one hand pulling him as close as he could against his body, pressing their crotches together and unable to ignore the hard on that was already in Peter’s loose pajama pants. The other hand went to the back of the head, tangling in the soft brown curls and leaning in for a hungry, desperate kiss.

Peter felt like a kid on Christmas morning. What he had been craving since that night, what he had almost lost faith would ever happen again, was _finally_ happening. And because he didn’t know how long it would last - Stark could pull away and change his mind at any second- he didn’t hold back.

They kissed passionately, devouring each other. Peter was sloppy and overly excited, his tongue leaving traces of saliva all over their lips and that only made Tony _harder_. So innocent but yet so sure, going for what he wanted, which right now consisted of roaming his hands under the older man’s jacket, all over his back and sides, like he was trying to map him. When Tony caught Peter’s lower lip between his teeth and slowly and delicately pulled away, a very indecent moan escaped the boy’s throat, rolling his hips without even thinking. Tony let his lip go as he breathed out deeply, tilting his head back in pure pleasure at the friction in his groin.

“Can I... please, can I touch you?” Peter had a begging, adoring look in his face, his eyes glossy and pleading.

Tony just nodded and let Peter gently push him until his back was flat against the wall. He couldn’t speak. If he said anything, all this became his fault, even though deep down he knew it already was. He was being dragged to hell by an angel, quietly and willingly.

Something screamed inside of him- his conscience, maybe? - when the kid undid his belt buckle. He could still stop this, he could just push the boy’s hands away, tell him this was never going to happen and walk out the door. But he didn’t. Peter opened the button of his pants and pulled the zipper down carefully, like he was handling something fragile. Then looked up and locked eyes with Tony as he slid his hand into his pants and rubbed his hard on.

“Oh god, kid...” he threw his head back, unable to hold the boy’s half lidded gaze.

Peter massaged the bulge through the underwear and Tony wasn’t even thinking anymore. He was so hard, so turned on, so ready for anything.

“Mr. Stark... I- I’ve never tried it but... I know how it’s done... Like, I’ve seen videos and stuff... And I really want to do it to you...” Peter had taken his chance when Tony threw his head back and was now talking as he liked and kissed the exposed skin of his neck.

“Do, _ah-_ do what, sweetheart?” Tony heard himself moan.

There was a moment of silence and then Peter just whispered.

“Can I suck it _,_ Mr. Stark _, please_?”

Holy _shit._

Tony had had a ridiculous amount of sexual partners in all his years, but he didn’t recall anyone who had _asked him_ if they could suck him. His dick was throbbing in his boxers and he could feel it leaking already. _Fuck._

He grabbed Peter’s face and kissed him long and deep before he gently pushed down, a hand resting on the boy’s head. Peter completely understood that was green light and got on his knees. He had been very confident up until this point. Now that he was face to face with it, he could feel the nervousness growing. Peter tried to remember every single porno he had ever seen and decided to try to recreate that as well as he could.

When the kid looked up at him and ran his tongue across the clothed length without ever breaking eye contact, Tony openly moaned. So beautiful, so pure, so completely devoted to him. To make him _feel good._ He watched as Peter’s clearly inexperienced trembling hands pulled his pants and boxers down, freeing his cock to which he moaned again and loud because, oh god, underwear had been tight for sometime now.

Peter looked at it and, surprisingly, he thought it was kind of pretty. Before he could even think about what he was doing, he took out his tongue and gave the length a tentative lick from the root to the head and lapped it a few times, experimentally, like a lollipop.

“Holy _shit!_ ” Tony gasped above him, his hand flying to grasp Peter’s hair.

Encouraged by Tony’s curse and the hand resting on his head, Peter wrapped his lips around the head and swirled his tongue around it. Another rather loud and throaty moan escaped Mr. Stark, so Peter went all in and, careful not to run his teeth across the skin, he took all that he could in his mouth until the head hit the back of this throat.

“Oh god, Peter, that’s perfect...” _you’re perfect..._

Tony had to concentrate as hard as ever in his entire life not to grab Peter’s head and start pumping into the kid’s mouth. Although his head was in the clouds and all the blood in his system was currently pooled around his groin, he was very aware that this was Peter’s first time ever giving head, so deep throating was something he was probably not ready for.

Peter started to bob his head up and down, occasionally taking the cock out of his mouth and just stroking it while running his tongue through the tip. His jaw was starting to ache; he struggled to breathe at times and thought to himself that this was way harder than it looked on the videos. He noticed that Tony moaned and breathed lauder and harder when he’d keep just the tip in his mouth and then swallow him full, so he kept doing that.

“Oh, _fuck,_ Peter, you’re a natural...” Tony was coming undone and Peter felt so proud of himself, enough to get him to be a bit bolder. He took Tony in his hand and stroked him faster, running the tip through his parted lips while looking up into Mr. Stark’s eyes.

“Or maybe it’s just my mouth was made to have your _cock_ in it” Peter smiled shyly, gave a long lick to the head and that was it.

“Peter, I’m gonna- I’m...”

Tony saw stars as he spilled himself on Peter’s face and mouth, white stripes of cum covering his pink flushed cheeks and abused lips. And damn it, he was _fucking beautiful_ , taking Tony’s entire load without moving a single inch.

But as soon as the waves of his orgasm washed away, the guilt kicked in, and Tony felt like he was falling from space into that wormhole in New York again. What had he done? Trying to get his breath back to normal speed, he took Peter’s hand and helped him up, pulling up his pants and boxers back in place.

“You sh-“ his voice broke for a second so he cleared his throat. “You should wash that off before it dries...” he couldn’t make eye contact for some reason.

Peter looked slightly shocked, like he was waiting for something different, but obediently went into the bathroom and rinsed his face. His heart felt to the ground when through the sound of the running water he heard a door slamming shut.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter is like a drug and Tony is heavily using. He has to stop it... even if it hurts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My lovely readers,
> 
> I am soooo sorry this took me ages to finish, but life and a bit of a writer's block got in the way.
> 
> First of all, Peter's crazy night out is actually canon: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8KTVToH6ZQk
> 
> Second of all, threw in some smut because... well, because there's no such thing as too much smut, right?
> 
> And yes, a bit of angst because it's good for ya
> 
> Hope you guys enjoy it! And I promise I won't take forever to update again <3

Four loud bangs woke him up and for a minute, he was terrified. He couldn’t see.

Immediately panicking, he put his hands in his face and pulled the clothing up and got it out of his head. He’d fallen asleep with the Spiderman mask on and it had moved during the night. 

He was lying in a really big ass bed. It took him a minute to figure out where he was and what was happening. His eyes felt like ping pong balls and his head hurt like hell.

Four more bangs on the door.

“Hey! You there?”

Happy’s very irritated voice came from the outside the room. He looked around. _Shit._ He was in his hotel room and every single minibar bottle was empty, scattered around the floor. _Double shit._  

“I’m not missing breakfast because of your lazy ass, kid!”

 He took the covers off and he was mortified. He was completely naked and there was a big stain on the sheets. It was sticky and dry. Oh _god_ …

“I’m going down. The buffet closes in twenty minutes, and I’m warning you, we’re not stopping at a Starbucks on our way to the plane!”

He heard Happy’s loud footsteps walk away. 

What _the fuck_ had happened last night?

He remembered Tony in his room… what he did… and then the sound of the door slamming shut and sitting on the toilet, hiding his face in his hands and crying. For a long time. He knew he had made a huge mistake and Mr. Stark would probably never talk to him again. He remembered his head swimming with a bunch of questions like why did he leave? Didn’t he like it?

‘ _You’re a natural_ ’

‘ _That’s perfect…_ ’

Why would he say all that stuff to him while he was doing it and then just go?

Peter remembered feeling as down as he had ever felt in his life, hating himself for being so stupid. Why had he thought Tony would like him? He was just a kid, and he probably had had so many people – actually age appropriate - do that to him who were way better than Peter at it. He wasn’t good enough, not nearly good enough for a man like Tony Stark.

He remembered opening the minibar, hoping to forget, to erase the memory of what happened and ease the pain in his chest. So he drank, bottle after bottle, silent tears streaming down his face and then…

Flashes of last night started coming back to him. He was wearing his new Spiderman costume, swinging from building to building, jumping. He was at a party, the music was loud and people were cheering for him while he was doing back flips and jumps. The booze made him confident and reckless but his super fast metabolism processed the alcohol so fast, he never got to feel actually drunk, so he kept drinking.

He cringed when he remembered swinging girls around the city, excited that they were so amazed. The kind of reaction he would never get from someone like Tony...

And the rest was foggy. 

— 

Back at the compound, Tony was watching the doctors work on James when F.R.I.D.A.Y informed him that an article about Spiderman had been published in a German newspaper. He opened the file in his hologram device and frowned at the screen.

**‘Der Erstaunliche Klebrige Junge rettet Kanzler’**

The article came with a picture of a shadow carrying someone in their arms while swinging from a thread between buildings. Then Tony noticed... this was from last night. He excused himself, rushing to his studio and locking the door.

“F.R.I.D.A.Y, access the Spiderman suit’s Baby Monitor Protocol files and show me the footage recorded last night.” 

“Yes, boss” 

The screen lit up and there he was. At a party in someone’s rooftop, taking selfies with a bunch of people, getting pecks from random girls... _and drinking_. He was swinging girls around in his Spiderman costume while he was _drunk_. Tony felt his heart accelerate and his jaw clench tight, although he couldn’t really tell what was making him angry: the fact that Peter had been so irresponsible, the fact that he’d been hanging with cute, impressionable girls he could actually let off steam with or the loud voice in his head that screamed ‘this is you own goddamn fault!’. He knew self-destructive behavior when he saw it, because, well, he was kind of an expert on this particular subject. 

He fast forward until he saw the inside of the room again, wanting to make sure Peter had returned to the hotel in one piece. He heard the button being pressed and the sound of the suit loosing up, sliding off of Peter’s body. Some more fumbling of clothes and the kid let himself fall onto the bed facing the ceiling. Then he looked down...

Tony dropped his gaze for a second, knowing that he should turn off the feed immediately when Peter’s completely naked body appeared in frame. Even more so when he sighed and wrapped his hand around his pink, soft cock and lazily started to stroke it. He knew he shouldn’t be watching this, it was a huge violation of the boy’s privacy but the he heard him. 

“Hm- _uh... Mr. Stark”_  

Oh god.

His eyes were helplessly glued to the screen, his cock hardening by the second in his pants as he watched the kid stroke himself, whimpering and occasionally moaning his name. Peter’s smooth dick was already leaking with pre-come in a matter of minutes and Tony knew it was wrong, but the bulge in his pants was starting to feel painful. He slowly unzipped his pants, just enough to pull out his own erection and grab it in his hand, starting to stroke himself with a soft moan.

Then Peter brought his hand to his face and Tony heard a sloppy sound.

Oh, my _god._

He watched in awe as the kid contorted in the bed, bringing his feet up to the headboard. Tony bit his lip when his cock twitched in his hand as a perfect little tight-looking hole appeared in front of his eyes. Peter took his wet finger covered in his own spit and circled around it, watching the muscle tremble at his touch. Tony couldn’t fucking _breath_ in anticipation, the hardness of his cock becoming almost unbearable when Peter slipped the finger in, followed by a very indecent, very loud moan.

Tony furiously pumped his cock while he watched the finger go in and out of Peter’s hole, stretching it, listening to the beautiful sounds the boy was making as he fingered himself. The kid grabbed his leaking cock with his other hand and stroked it at the same time. The breaths became shorter, the whimpering louder and when Stark felt a drop of sweat running down his forehead...

“Oh god, _Tony, please!_ ”

Peter let out a series of cries, almost painful, like the pleasure was too much to take as his beautiful cock burst shots of white cum all over his stomach. As he rode his orgasm, he took out his finger and picked up some of the fluid on his belly, just to stick it back in his hole with a shiver.

Tony just could _not_ handle the kid chanting his name and the vision of Peter’s hole leaking cum so he came _hard_ with muffled grunts, folding himself in half from the intensity in which every muscle in his body tensed at his release. 

He just stood there, panting, while he heard the sound of Peter sighing and getting under the covers, not even bothering to take the Spiderman mask off. He felt wrong. He felt exactly the same as when he left the kid’s room back in Berlin. He _knew_ it was wrong. It was _so_ very wrong. He was such a bad human being for wanting this and enjoying it, but he couldn’t help himself. It was like a drug: he knew he had to quit it, he knew it was doing him no good, but he just went for it because... the feeling of desire overpowered him in a way that was completely irrational. And afterwards, the shame kicked in, the regret, the guilt. It was unbearable.

And just like any other drug, he knew the only sensible thing to do was to go cold turkey and just quit.

“Boss, Happy Hogan and Peter Parker have just landed.” the AI’s voice informed him through the speakers on the screen.

__

The car ride back home was the most surreal, uncomfortable experience Peter had ever gone through. When they met at the hangar, Tony barely looked at him in the eye. He greeted him with a dry, almost angry ‘hey, kid’ and proceeded to talk to Happy about getting a car and driving him to the city. He thought _this is it._ He’s going to arrange it so that the minute he drops him off, he’d never see the man again. A rush of desperation and nervousness travelled through his spine and settled on his stomach. He had to say something, _anything_. But he couldn’t.

He waited in the driveway for the car as he’d been instructed, head hanging low, trying to accept the situation as it was and repressing forcefully the burning tears that wanted to roll off his eyes. So, obviously, when the car stopped in front of him and Tony opened the back door from the inside, he was confused but also a bit relieved that he had a bit more time before the inevitable goodbye.

The car was silent like a graveyard for the first fifteen minutes. He sat as far away from Mr. Stark as he could, eyes glued to the road behind the window glass. He wanted to turn around and talk to him, but every time he thought about doing that, the same questions popped in his head.

  _Why did you leave me? Didn’t you like it? Didn’t you like me? Am I ever going to see you again after this? Are you mad at me? What did I do to make you so... cold, all of the sudden? _

And then, as he asked those questions in his mind, a terrible feeling took hold of his trail of thought.

  _Oh god, please, don’t shut me out. Don’t vanish me from your life, not now. Please, give me another chance. I’ll be good, I’ll do whatever you want, but please don’t leave me…_

He felt the tears pooling in his eyes again, so he closed his eyes and shook his head trying to push the feelings down and shut up the whining, needy, terrified voice in his head.

 When Tony broke the silence, he held his breath.

 “That was some party last night, huh?”

 Peter’s head turned so fast he thought he’d pulled a muscle in his neck. Eyes widened in utter panic. Happy was _right there_. Why would he talk about _that_ with Happy _right there?_

 “Uh- well, uh-” he stuttered, helplessly trying to focus his gaze on anything but Tony.

“You know,” Stark cut him off “I’ve had my wild days too but underage drinking, swinging from buildings while carrying civilians just for the fun of it… I’d think that someone who wants to become an Avenger would be a little bit more responsible.”

 Peter’s mind was going a thousand miles per hour.

 “How- how did you…?”

 “Well, didn’t you see you made the paper’s front page back in good old Deutschland?”

 Tony then took out his phone and a projection of a German newspaper appeared in front of Peter’s very confused eyes, and even in the light blue shimmer Stark could see his face turn pale.

“I-” the kid looked at the screen and then at Tony, opening and closing his mouth “I didn’t-” the man’s expression hardened as if he was clearly warning him not to lie “I was just-” Peter sighed and his voice turned into a whisper full of shame “I was trying to-”

_Forget._

He didn’t say it but Tony didn’t need him to because he knew the feeling of trying to drown your sorrows on liquor quite well. Then it hit him. Peter wasn’t being reckless for the sake of being reckless; he was hurting because of _him_. The kid saw the expression on Tony’s face twist into pity and guilt as he turned off the phone.

“I’m sorry, kiddo” that came in a very low, very painful whisper as Stark stared at the ground.

And Peter didn’t really think about it. Seeing him so full of regret and pain was more that his heart could endure, so he just moved over a bit closer to him and put his hand over the older man’s and whispered.

 “Please, don’t. Don’t be” and when Tony looked at him, he could read every silent plea in his gaze, the expression of complete and utter admiration filling those warm brown puppy eyes.

 It took Tony all the strength in the world to gently pull his hand from underneath Peter’s and tear his gaze away from the beautiful young man’s face, but he knew what he had to do. He couldn’t keep giving into his own selfish desires without thinking of the repercussions for the kid. The last thing he would allow himself to do was to knowingly hurt Peter, and even though when he pulled away he swore he’d seen a tear run through the kid’s cheek, he knew he was doing the right thing.

After that the car became a moving grave again. After a while, Peter took out his phone and played around with it, trying to distract his mind looking at the videos he’d made from the trip. Tony couldn’t help but peep over his shoulder.

“What are you doing, a little video diary?”

 “Yeah…” Peter’s head was hanging low although he was really trying his best not to look defeated.

 Tony couldn’t stand it so he resorted to the only way he knew how to handle these situations: bury his feelings deep inside and avoid the issue.

 “You know what? We should make an alibi video for your aunt.”

 Peter looked startled for a second.

 “An alibi? Y-yeah, sure.”

 “We rolling? Get in frame”

Peter got closer so they’d both fit into the screen and put on the best happy face he could, given the circumstances and the closeness to the man who had just literally rejected him a bit earlier.

“Hi, May! What are you wearing, something skimpy, I hope” Tony laughed at his own joke while Peter just frowned and shot him a look of ‘are you fucking kidding me right now?’ that made Tony’s laugh die rapidly “That’s inappropriate, let’s start over, you can edit it. Three, two, one… Hey, May! My gosh, I wanted to tell you what an _incredible_ job your nephew did this weekend at the Stark Internship retreat.” Peter couldn’t help but smile a little. By now he could tell when Tony was being serious or sarcastic and this was definitely a real compliment. “Everyone was impressed-”

A car cut them off and Happy honked angrily.

The rest of the ride was Tony basically annoying the fuck out of Happy in an attempt to cheer Peter up, and the kid tried to laugh uncomfortably at his jokes because he found the gesture incredibly sweet.

“Happy, can you give us a moment?” Tony said when the car stopped in front of May’s building.

“You want me to leave the car?” he asked in disbelief. 

“Just grab Peter’s case out of the trunk”

He sighed and got out of the car, clearly angry with his boss. Peter was still floating on cloud nine because he loved the way his name sounded on Tony’s lips, so he didn’t really register when the man turned to face him. 

“Look, I understand that after what happened you felt like blowing off some steam. I’m really sorry for putting you through that and I promise you it won’t happen again” Tony said in a serious tone that left clear there was no room for discussion.

“But-” Peter had so many questions and so little time “but I wanted- I _wanted_ it to happen. We did nothing wrong! _You_ did nothing wrong!”

“Peter, _enough_. You are a child, you’re not thinking straight. But I am a grown up, and it’s the grown up’s job to stop a situation like that and I didn’t and _I’m sorry._ ”

“You have _nothing_ to be sorry for! Please… Can’t we just- can we talk about this? Please.”

Tony sighed and rubbed his face with the palm of his hand, like he was extremely tired.

“There’s nothing else to talk about, Peter. It’s illegal, it’s wrong and it’s not happening again. Ever.” He said that last word as if it were the dot at the end of a sentence, making it clear that there was nothing Peter could say to change his mind.

There was a heavy silence after that and Tony had to watch painfully as the kid’s gaze fell to his lap in defeat and he felt like the worst human being on earth. Damn it. How could it be that doing the right thing made him feel like crap too?

“Hey,” he grabbed Peter’s chin and made him look up “I can understand how you felt and why you got drunk and left the hotel, but if you’re gonna keep the suit, I don’t want to see you doing something so reckless _ever_ again, do you understand?”

Peter’s jaw fell open slowly while he looked at him in awe. He was tearing up. 

“I can keep the suit?”

Tony was melting at the look on the kid’s face, like he had just told him that he could have Christmas morning everyday for the rest of his life.

“Yes, we were just talking about it” Tony said casually, putting his sunglasses back on. “So do me a favor… Happy is kind of your point guy on this: don’t stress him out. Don’t do anything stupid. I’ve seen his cardiogram. Alright?”

 “Yes!” Peter was way too excited to process half of what he was saying.

 “Don’t do anything I _would_ do. And definitely don’t do anything I _wouldn’t_ do. There’s a- there’s a little gray area there and that’s were you operate.”

 “Wait,” Peter just realized something and his eyes lit up “does that mean that I’m an Avenger?”

 “No-”

 They were interrupted by Happy knocking on the window and holding the silver case up.

 “This it?”

 “Seventh floor” Tony immediately instructed.

 “I can take that” Peter quickly said. “You don’t have to take that.”

 “You can take it?” Then Happy looked straight into Tony’s eyes through the window and added, very annoyed. “Thank you”.

 Peter turned around and took a deep breath. He was about to ask something he didn’t know if he wanted the answer to.

“So…” he looked at the floor, way too scared to meet Mr. Stark’s eyes “when’s our next… retreat? You know…” 

When he looked up he felt devastated. Tony was so close, so perfect, so elegant and classy and just plain hot behind those sunglasses. He just wanted to freeze that moment and live in it for the rest of his days.

“What, our next mission?”

“Yeah… the mission. The missions”

_Oh god, he’s going to tell me there will be no next mission, that this was a one time thing._

_Just like what happened in Berlin…_

_ I’m _ _just a one time thing._  

Tony saw the fear behind Peter’s poor attempt to sound casual and he decided not to crush the kid twice in one day.

“We’ll call you.”

It was almost imperceptible but the corners of Peter’s mouth stretched a bit because he was internally smiling in relief.

“Do- do you have my numbers?”

“No, I mean-” Tony was very quick to correct him because he didn’t want the kid to keep any hopes of intimacy up “like, _someone_ will call you.”

Peter nodded, slightly disappointed. Tony’s anxiety was starting to take the best of him. He was trying to do what was best for the kid but every time he opened his mouth he was hurting him. He needed to get out of there _fast_. He leaned over Peter to open the car door when he felt the kid’s arms wrap around him and his head resting on his shoulder. Tony panicked. 

“That’s- that’s not a hug, I’m just grabbing the door for you.” He said while he pushed the car door open and sat back in his seat, a bit further away from Peter than he’d been before and avoiding looking at him. 

Peter quickly moved back looking confused and hurt. He lingered for a couple of seconds, waiting to see if Tony did something else. Was he really going to leave like this? That was it? 

When Mr. Stark didn’t move an inch, he looked down and slowly got out of the car, a tiny part of him still having faith that Tony would just reach out to stop him…

But it didn’t happen.

He was out of the car; next to his suitcase and he heard a ‘bye!’ coming from the inside the vehicle just before the door shut close and the motor growled to life. Suddenly he felt that last bit of hope die inside of him and the feeling of despair was overwhelming, like he was living a dream because this _couldn’t_ be happening. Flashes of memories came rushing down his mind: the first time they met, making out in the car, Tony leaning over him at the airport with a worried look on his face, the hotel room, the way Mr. Stark moaned when he got on his knees, when he made him feel good… With the sound of the door slamming closed still ringing in his head, he watched the man he loved drive away and leave him with a crippling emptiness inside, a hole in his chest that felt heavy and oppressive. A lonely, anxious thought ran through Peter’s mind:

_And now, what?_


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter lets Ned in on a secret... or two.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ok, again, so sorry. I'm taking longer to write because I have an insane amount of work lately. I feel so bad but sadly, this isn't my day job lol
> 
> Hope this makes up for the wait.
> 
> I really wanted to capture the essence of Ned. I hope I did.
> 
> You know I love comments. My symbiote eats comments. So, you know, feel free to comment lol 
> 
> Enjoy!

The alarm went off and Peter smashed it blindly with a grunt.

Here we go again, another God forsaken day of school and all he could think about was putting that suit on and the sun was only rising.

Peter had always been a really great student without even trying. He was one of those annoyingly smart kids that everybody else in class smiles at but is secretly jealous of and he knew it. It’s not like he wanted or could help it though. He just read things and as soon as he understood them, they stuck in his mind and that was it. But lately all he could focus on was getting out of there as soon as possible, put on the suit and patrol. I mean, he was trying to do good with the powers he had, looking out for the little guy and all but he’d be lying if he said that’s all there was to it. In the back of his mind there was a far more selfish motive: to make Tony proud, to make him see that he was no child. That he was a  _man_ , a powerful one at that, and not only could he take care of himself, he could also fight alongside him and even protect him if it ever came to that.

The problem was the trouble Peter encountered in the streets of New York wasn’t exactly Avengers-worthy. He was happy he could help everyday people, but he  _yearned_  for something bigger. Something he could report to Happy and would actually reach Tony.

That day, as soon as the bell rang, he went to Delmar’s to grab a sandwich and then ran into a deserted alley to put on his suit. The suit Tony made him. It felt somewhat comforting knowing the man himself had designed it, made him feel closer to him even though he was miles away. After his patrol, he called Happy and it went to voice mail – as usual. He told him about the bike and the old lady who was lost and got him a churro. He was about to go home when he saw the guys with the masks in the ATM...

 

* * *

 

 

_Well, this is stupid._

Tony rolled his eyes, feeling more anxious than ever before. He was sitting on the ground with his legs crossed and there was nothing but silence in the room, except for the instructor's irritatingly low humming. It sounded like a broken AC and it made Tony want to stick a screwdriver up his nose, see if that would  ~~shut him up~~  fix it.

After what happened in Berlin with the kid and the whole thing with Steve, he’d been drinking again. The pain from Cap’s betrayal, watching his parents die  _right in front of him_  on that screen, the Avengers dissolving – a group that he regretted to admit had become some sort of family to him… It was too much. And with Pepper gone he was unsupervised, he was alone. He had Rhodey, but he was going through some pretty intense shit as it was and he just couldn’t bring himself to drag him into his own problems on top of that. Besides, it’s not like he could go up to him and tell him about the kid… It seemed stupid that after  _all_  he’d been through  _that_  was the one thing he could not stop thinking about. And the guilt… oh God, the guilt was drowning him.

The day he woke up on the floor, passed out with an empty bottle by his side, he decided he had to do something about it. Stupidly enough, he thought that some time alone with his own thoughts would help him. So he flew to India, to this very exclusive meditation retreat that was supposed to bring you inner peace and clarity through clean meals and exercise and all that jazz… some sort of rehab center for the soul. He knew he was probably going to hell already anyway, but it had seemed like a good idea at the time. Now he was sitting there, with his private instructor guiding him through his meditation session and all he could think about was going back to his room to check Happy’s voice mail. He’d been avoiding peeping on the footage from the Baby Monitor since… well, what happened the last time.

“Yeah, ok, this was fun. Let's do it again sometime” he didn’t even wait for the yogi’s response. He got up and left, feeling his anxiety creeping up on him as he practically ran to his room. What if the kid was in danger while he was sitting on a mat chanting mantras? This wasn’t soothing at all. This was making it  _worse_.

By the time he reached the room, his hands were shaking. He sat down on his bed and dialed Happy’s voice mail. 

_“Hey, Happy! Here’s my report for tonight. I stopped a grand theft bicycle. Couldn’t find the owner so I just left a note…”_

As soon as he heard the kid’s voice, he sensed all his muscles relax instantly, like he’d been injected with a tranquilizer.  _The kid was ok._  He smiled and remembered he was supposed to breathe.

He knew this feeling, the calm that comes after the fix.

Peter was  _literally_ like a drug to him.

Being away from him hurt, being close to him hurt. Was this what life was meant to be? Hurting? He knew he had nothing to complain about. He had a great life, better than most people, but man, the amount of pain he'd been through was insane. And he could design no machine that would fix that. Nothing his money could buy would fix that. He just wanted to be  _happy_. And for a while there, he kind of had been. He was working on the clean energy business, he had the Avengers, he had Pepper and he was fine. Not happy, but  _fine._ And he wasn’t a greedy man, he could do with  _fine_. But it didn’t last. Apparently, nothing ever did.

_“… so yeah, just call me back. It’s Peter. Parker.”_

He heard the beep as the message ended and he ran his hands through his face as the tears burned in his eyes. Feeling as sad and pathetic as he’d ever felt, he pressed the button and replayed the message, feeling as though he was hanging from a cliff and the kid’s voice was the only thing that would keep him from falling.

 

* * *

 

Peter was still shaky when he dropped to the floor in his room and gently closed the door so May wouldn’t notice he’d just, literally, crawled in. His heart stopped though when he turned around and saw Ned sitting on his bed, looking at him without even blinking and his jaw practically dislocated.

The unfinished Lego Death Star he’d been holding in his hands dropped to floor and smashed.

“What was that?!” he heard May screaming from outside.

“Uh… it’s nothing! Nothing!” he replied rapidly, completely terrified.

“You’re the Spiderman… From YouTube” Ned couldn’t take his eyes off of him, still in shock.

Peter pressed the button on his chest and the suit slipped off his body.

“I’m not. I’m not.” His friend had been in the room the entire time so he knew there was no use lying, but he didn’t know what else to do.

“You were on the  _ceiling_ ” Ned pointed with his finger up, as if to illustrate were Peter had been a few seconds ago, still unable to look away.

“No, I wasn’t.” There it was again, what was he doing? He had to shift the focus of the conversation and quick. “Ned, what are you doing in my room?!”

“May let me in! You said we were gonna finish the Death Star!”

“You can’t just bust into my room!” Peter was panicking by the second.

The door flew open to reveal an oblivious Aunt May trying to run away from the smoke in the kitchen.

“That turkey meatloaf recipe is a disaster” she let her hair down and laughed at her own mess. “Let’s go to dinner. Thai? Ned, you want Thai?”

Ned forgot about everything for a second and couldn’t help but smile stupidly at her.

“Yes...”

“No.” Peter cut him off “He’s got a thing.”

“A thing to do after.” Ned finished his sentence.

“Okay…” as she turned to leave, she stopped on the doorway and pointed at her nephew’s very naked chest. “Maybe put on some clothes.”

As soon as the door closed, Ned turned to his friend in disbelief.

“She doesn’t  _know?!_ ”

“Nobody knows!” Peter said, grabbing a t-shirt that was lying around “Mr. Stark knows because he made my suit but  _that’s it_!”

Suddenly it was like someone had knocked the breath out of Ned.

“ _Tony Stark_ made you  _that?!_ ”

Peter was putting on the t-shirt when he flinched. He felt silent as he looked down, because hearing the sound of the name out loud felt like being thrown into ice-cold water.

“Peter?”

When he mastered the strength to look at his friend, Ned’s face was full of concern.

“Ned… sit down. Gotta tell you something.”

“Dude, you’re scaring me, what is it? Are you sick? Is that why you can climb walls? Did some, like, lab accident-”

“No! No, Ned, just…” he motioned towards the bed and he walked over to him and sat down. “I- Remember that day I texted you? The day I had that big fight with May and texted you to meet me at that bar?”

Ned slowly sat down next to him and nodded silently. It was a weird look on Ned, being so quiet for longer than five seconds. Peter took a deep breath, feeling as scared as he had ever been in his life. He'd never 'come out' to anyone before and, on top of that, there was the age difference, and on top of that, the fact that the man was a frigging celebrity. He knew he was his best friend and he could tell him anything, but still he felt a tight knot in his stomach.

“I- I met someone there” he waited for a reaction, but the look on Ned’s face didn’t change. “He- It was Tony. I mean, Mr. Stark. But he didn't- he didn't know I was, well, me.”

Peter knew he wasn't making any sense but kept adding long pauses between sentences, hoping Ned would magically catch on so he didn’t have to say it out loud. But then he realized how incomprehensive this whole situation sounded for someone who didn’t know anything about it.

“We, like, talked for a while and he gave me a ride home” he paused again and looked down on the floor, afraid to watch his friend’s face as he prepared himself to say it.  _Oh God, here it goes_. “We kind of- we made out in his car.”

That last bit came out more like a barely audible mumble. Peter kept his gaze firmly on the ground, waiting for a gasp or a scream or a sound of disgust, but there was nothing but silence. A crushing, terrifying silence. And then Ned finally broke it.

“You… y-…” he was trying to say something but seemed to struggle for words.

_He’s gonna leave. He’s gonna look at me like I’m some sort of weirdo and he’s gonna leave and he’ll never speak to me again. He’s not going to want to be around me, he’s gonna be disgusted… Oh my God, what have I done?_

But to Peter’s amazement, when he finally got the words out, Ned didn’t sound disgusted or outraged or scared.

“You made out with Tony  _fucking_ Stark?!”

He sounded  _thrilled_.

Peter looked up for the first time in minutes and saw his friend with a huge grin plastered across his face. Ned looked like he'd just told him he had a date with the hottest girl in school. He felt like he could breathe again. What had he been so scared of? He mentally kicked himself and wondered why he hadn’t told him sooner.

“I didn’t know he was into guys too. He’s been with a ton of women, though, that’s for sure. But I guess rich guys do that? Not being bi, I mean being with a lot of people. Was he, like, very experienced and stuff? Is that how you got the Stark Internship? Is the suit a gift? Oh my God, is Tony Stark  _your sugar daddy_ now? ”

And that made Peter wonder  _why had he told him_. He blushed intensely at the term and shamefully discovered that it was kind of a turn on. Tony Stark, his  _sugar daddy_. He shook his head, driving the thought away rapidly, not wanting to get  _too_  excited.

“Jeez, Ned, no! I’m not a… I’m not some sort of superhero escort!”

But there was no stopping Ned now, the questions were just rolling off his tongue.

“So how far did you guys, you know… go? Are you a virgin? Did he, like, deflower you? Is that ok to say? Deflower? Is he gonna come with his super expansive cars to pick you up after school and make out and stuff?”

Peter laughed hard and it suddenly hit him that he hadn’t done that in while.

“No! He didn't- Anyway, the thing is, after that he showed up at my house. He had found out that it was me in those YouTube clips, so he gave me the suit and flew me to Germany to fight Captain America and his 'gang'.”

“You’ve met  _Captain America_?!” Peter loved how the whole ‘being gay thing’ to Ned was nothing compared to meeting superheroes.

“Actually, I stole his shield” Peter said proudly.

“No way!” Ned was gasping for air and suddenly he looked like he’d been hit in the head with something. “So wait, does this mean you’re an Avenger now?”

Peter tilted his head to the side, feeling a little cocky.

“Well, yeah, basically”

“And you’re dating  _Tony Stark_?!”

That felt like a knife right through his heart. He looked down, all his excitement suddenly gone.

“No, I’m… He says it can’t happen because I’m only sixteen.”

Ned empathically toned down his own excitement, throwing an arm over his best bud.

“But he likes you, right?” he shook his friends back in an attempt to cheer him up. “I mean, he liked you at the bar when he didn’t know, so…”

“And he liked me in my hotel room in Berlin, too…”

“ _Shut up!_  Did you guys  _do_  it in a hotel room in Germany?!”

Peter rested his elbows on his knees and his head fell down, looking at the floor again.

“No. I mean, we did  _stuff_ , but not that.”

 _Actually, I did stuff. He didn’t do shit._  Peter thought bitterly.

Ned was frowning, trying to think about the situation. It was a huge amount of information to dump on someone all at once and Peter was very much surprised his friend was keeping up.

“I don’t get it” Ned finally said. “So yeah, he didn’t know how old you were when you guys first met, but if something happened in Berlin, he knew by then, right? So what does the age have to do with anything?”

“He said… Last time I saw him, he said it was wrong and he should have stopped it and that it can never happen again.”

Peter felt devastated. Saying it out loud to someone else made it all seem so much more real and made him relive every single detail of what had happened. It felt like he’d sliced that barely healed wound open again and he could feel the pulse of his heart behind it. It was torture.

“But… he didn’t, right?” Ned asked mysteriously.

“Huh?”

“I mean… he  _said_  he should have stopped it, but he  _didn’t_. So maybe he does like you, it’s just he doesn’t think he  _should_.”

Peter waved the thought away. He didn’t want to lift his hopes up again. He turned to his friend, with a serious look of warning on his face.

“Ned, nobody – and I mean  _nobody_  can know about this, ok? You gotta keep it a secret.”

Ned shrugged and simled.

“Peter, I don’t think anyone wants to know what kind of stuff you do with Iron Man-”

“I mean  _all_ of this” Peter cut him off. “The Spiderman thing, the Tony thing, the Avengers thing… No one can know  _any_  of it, understand?”

“Keep Spiderman a secret?! Why?”

“Because if May finds out people are trying to kill me every night she’s not gonna let me do this anymore!” Peter was desperate. The one thing he couldn’t do was hurt his aunt, not after everything she’d been through.

“Ok, ok. I’ll level with you. I can keep the sugar daddy thing quiet but you’re an Avenger! This is the greatest thing that’s ever happened to me!”

“Ned,  _please_.”

His friend looked a little disappointed for a second but finally he gave in.

“Okay”

“Thank you” Peter breathed, relieved.

There was a few seconds of silence, obviously broken by Ned.

“So… Can I try the suit on?”

Peter rolled his eyes.

“No”

“How’s it work? Is it magnets? How do you shoot the strings?”

Peter grabbed Ned by the shoulders and kindly but firmly directed him out of the room.

“I’m gonna tell you about it at school tomorrow, ok?” he said while he practically pushed him out.

As soon as the door closed, he rested his back on it and ran his hands through his hair.

 

After Ned left, May took him out to this little Thai restaurant they loved that was right around the corner and even though he tried, Peter couldn’t stop thinking about what Ned had said.

_“He said he should have stopped it, but he didn’t. So maybe he does like you, it’s just he doesn’t think he should.”_

He kept pushing the thought away because he knew dwelling on it was only going to make things worse. Mr. Stark was firm the last time they spoke about it. It was never going to happen again and that was  _it_. But then Peter started to remember things, things he hadn’t paid attention to before because the rejection had been way too painful.

 

_“Peter, that’s not... I did like it. Very much, actually.”_

_“Look, it… it’s complicated.”_

_“But does it feel good?”_

_“Yes…”_

_“It’s illegal, it’s wrong and it’s not happening again. Ever.”_

 

Not once he’d said he didn’t  _like_  him and not once he'd said he didn’t  _want_  it. The explanations Tony had given him were always external. ‘It’s illegal’, ‘it’s wrong’, ‘it can’t happen.’ Maybe Ned was right. Maybe he did have a chance after all. But how…?

“How many times do I have to say ‘larb’ before you talk to me?” he heard May chuckle in the distance, like his incessant thoughts had been acting as noise cancelling headphones. “You know I ‘larb’ you.”

He smiled apologetically and looked down at his plate.

“I’m just stressed. The Internship… and I’m tired…” he played with the food, not really hungry at all after everything that had happened. “A lot of work”

“The Stark Internship?” May shook her head, disapprovingly. “I have to tell you,  _not_  a fan of that Tony Stark.”

Peter looked up from his plate and frowned.

_Oh aunt May, if only you knew…_


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Peter is fed up and Tony loses his shit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You have every right to be upset because this took WAY longer than I expected. The chapter kept growing and growing and it took a different direction than I expected.  
> Also, real life and Christmas got in the way.  
> Also, PLEASE READ THIS:
> 
> WARNING: mild violence/manhandling.  
> *UPDATE*: it's been pointed out that this warning is too unspecific, so: there's a slap in here somewhere. I hope that's specific enough so if anyone feels triggered, please skip this one. The rest will hopefully make sense anyway.
> 
> I'm looking for a BETA READER, just to have another set of eyes to make sure everything makes sense, specially character wise. If anyone's interested please contact me through Tumblr (@xarles56).
> 
> And last but not least, a HUGE thank you to The One and Only @im-a-goner-foryou who was kind enough to have a look at the chapter and gave me amazing advice.

“So, how long are you staying?”

The woman pushed the hair wave away from her left eye while batting her eyelashes at him. Tony resisted the urge to roll his eyes. He’d seen every move in the book and while he had been that kind of guy in the past, he felt like that persona had been dead for a hundred years. Besides, he would have never been able to flirt back because his mind was miles away.

Hundreds of miles away.

“Huh? Um- A few days I guess” he took his phone slightly out of his pocket and glanced at it. No notifications.

He really should make an effort to flirt back. The woman was hot. Red hair, pale skin, obscenely pouty lips and curvy in all the right places. The old Tony would have been all over her, using his well trained charm to seduce her and take her up to his room as soon as humanly possible. This should be the kind of thing he’s after and he knew it. But he just… wasn’t interested.

They were at a gathering the resort had put together for the guests to socialize. Everyone was well dressed with expensive garments meant for special occasions. There was an open bar – which only served virgin cocktails, obviously – and large table with some very fancy dishes for them to feast on. The place was beautiful and the food was great, but Tony could only think about the kid, New York and a good double scotch on the rocks, and in that particular order.

“That’s a pity” she said, a soft, sexy smile on her face.

“Yeah…” he took out his phone again. Nothing. “Well, it was lovely meeting you, em-”

She said her name but the phone vibrated in his pocket and he didn’t even hear her.

“Yeah. Excuse me.”

He walked away to a quiet corner and tried his best to hide, because carrying cellphones around was strictly forbidden during activities. The screen was blinking with a red light… an alert from Peter’s suit. His hands began to tremble as he tapped it, put his phone back in his pocket and put on his glasses.

“FRIDAY, talk to me.”

“Sir, the Spiderman suit’s is recording an abnormally high heart rate form Mr. Parker.”

“Show me footage” Tony was beginning to raise his voice without actually realizing. The drink in his hand shook violently making the ice-cubes tinkle.

“Accessing live feed from the Baby Monitor.”

The display on his glasses started playing the images and Tony had to find a plain surface to rest his drink on. He could see the kid’s feet trapped in some sort of metal structure and his hand moving frantically to free himself. It was dark and the background was black and dark blue and the one thing Tony could see clearly was two green dots staring down at him. _Staring?_

“What the-” with his breath quickly becoming erratic, he took out his phone again and activated the remote control on one of the Iron Man suits. “FRIDAY, gimme the kid’s location. Now.”

The location was displayed on the screen.

“Boss, the parachute in the Spiderman suit has been activated.”

He looked at screen still displaying the live feed and saw a blur of dark night sky, white cloth flying around and city lights.

He was _falling._ The kid was _falling from the goddamn sky._

Tony’s heart clenched like he was about to have a stroke.

“FRIDAY put everything we have in the thrusters” he realized his voice was high pitched and trembling.

“Yes, boss.”

Suddenly he heard a splash from the live feed and everything went dark. Had he hit the ground? If the chute hadn’t open properly, that fall was lethal, even for the kid. He was hyperventilating.

“FRIDAY, tell me something.”

“His oxygen levels are dropping, boss.”

He heard the muffled sounds of Peter struggling, like he was trapped. The sound was weird, like waves. No, it was bubbles. Water. He was under water. The kid was _drowning_. Tony could feel his own throat closing, a burning sensation in the back of his eyes.

When the Iron Man suit finally reached the location, Tony didn’t even slow down, he smashed the water going straight for the GPS signal the kid was still transmitting. He saw the tangled chute and ripped the fabric to free him, grabbing the limp form of the kid who was barely moving anymore. The thrusters propelled them out of the water.

“FRIDAY?”

“He’s breathing, boss.”

The kid slowly regained some sense of where he was and looked up confused.

“Uh? Hey…”

Tony sighed as he heard him softly whimper in exhaustion. He was torn between the feeling of relief washing over him and the anger that he had been ignoring so far because the main priority was getting the kid to safety as quickly as possible. He spotted a kids playground near the lake and descended, gently laying Peter down on top of a dome climber. He hovered in front of him as he sat up on the bars, pulling his mask up and breathing deeply, still coughing a bit.

“You alright, kid?”

“Yeah…” he let out a trembling sigh, wrapping his arms around himself.

Tony wanted to get out of that armor and hug him but he suddenly remembered he couldn’t. And then the anger kicked in.

“What the _hell_ was that?”

The kid looked at him apologetic, his eyes red and hair damp.

“I- I was at a party and I saw this big explosion in the distance,” he said as he shivered “and I went to investigate, you know? See what’s going on. Then these- these guys were there with a van, trying to sell this super weird weapons, so I was like ‘hey, what are you guys doing?’ and- and they just shot this awesome like energy blast and ran away!” Tony was cringing behind his glasses. _Awesome energy blast_. It’s a good thing he wasn’t there because he felt like grabbing him by his shoulders and shake him. “So I followed them” _Oh my GOD, did this kid have a death wish?!_ “and I was about to catch them but then this flying bird guy appeared and- and he had huge wings and he just like, swooped down, like a monster and he picked me up and uh- he took me up like a thousand feet and just dropped me!”

Tony breathed in deeply as Peter shivered, his body folding on itself from the cold. He wanted to yell at him and tell him what a big dumbass he was for putting himself in that reckless situation, but on the other hand he could tell from the dizzying speed of his story that the kid was very upset already, so he decided not to add any more drama.

“How did you find me?” Peter asked after a second of silence. “Did you put a tracker on my suit or something?”

Tony’s muscles went stiff and he tried to dodge the question casually, otherwise he was going to have to explain that not only he’d put a tracker on the boy’s suit but also every single surveillance Stark tech he could find.

“I… put everything in your suit. Including this heater.”

He took out his phone and activated it, praying that the warm feeling would distract Peter from the fact that he had just proven he had full access to the suit.

It worked.

“Wow, thanks!” the kid sighed with relief as the water evaporated from the fabric.

Tony really wanted to play nice but he was, too, still upset.

“What were you _thinking_?”

Peter looked astonished.

“The guy with the wings is obviously the source of the weapons, I gotta take him down!” he explained, as if it were the most obvious thing in the world.

This reckless, stupidly courageous little boy was a _fucking time bomb_. Tony kicked himself mentally. How had he not seen this coming? He motioned to one of the waiters to get him another drink.

“Take him down, now, huh?” he mocked. “Steady Crockett, there are people who handle this sort of thing.”

“The Avengers?”

“No, no, no. This is a little bit below their pay grade-”

“Anyway, Mr. Stark, you didn’t have to come all the way out here. I had that. I was fine”

Not only had he just interrupted him, but also he had the audacity to say he _had that_. That he _was fine_. Tony had never been more aware of the fact that this was a teenager. He sighed.

“Oh, I’m not _here_ ” he said dismissively. “Thank God this place has Wi-Fi or you would be toast right now” he grabbed the drink the waiter had brought him and tilted his head as a silent thank you. “Thank Ganesh while you’re at it. Cheers.”

Peter frowned.

“Ganesh? Wha- where are you?”

“Let’s just say I’m a bit far from home at the moment.” Tony took a sip and rolled his eyes. This no-alcohol policy from the resort was not helping the situation at all.

“You’re not at Stark Tower?”

Tony hesitated. Should he tell him? He knew he’d find out eventually, but he hadn’t thought about being the one delivering the news. _Oh, might as well…_

“I- I’m not going back to the Tower. We’re moving upstate.”

Peter felt every drop of blood on his body leave him and suddenly he was cold again, and it had nothing to do with the suit still being slightly wet. He was still trying to process the information but his body was already reacting to the idea as a shiver ran down his spine and his hands shook. He was leaving. Leaving the Tower, leaving New York. _Leaving him_. It’s not like he saw the man everyday – or at all, actually – but there was a painful comfort in passing by Stark Tower and looking up, knowing he was so close yet so far. Now he wouldn’t even have _that_.

Peter fought the urge to throw up, his head still spinning, and realized they’d both been silent long enough for the situation to be awkward, so he tried to speak, carefully adjusting his voice so it wouldn’t sound as broken.

“But- what about me?” It came out barely a whisper, a whine. _You sound pathetic, Parker, get it together._ He cleared his throat. “I mean, if you need me… for, like, a mission, I mean.”

Tony sighed as he felt the familiar clench in his heart. He could see it in his face, his eyes avoiding the Iron Man faceplate, the tight lips. He could hear it in his voice, too. Low, broken, sad. It only made it worse that the kid was such an incredibly bad liar. He had to be firm, though.

“What I need is for you to stay close to the ground!” He sounded way too exasperated so he tried to mellow his tone a bit, make it comforting almost. “Build up your game helping the little people, like the lady that bought you the churro-” Tony stopped himself in his tracks because he realized his mistake immediately.

The kid _knew_ he’d been leaving those messages on _Happy’s_ voicemail, not Tony’s, and there was no way for him to know about the churro unless he’d been listening to them on purpose. Which was exactly what had happened, but there was _no way_ he could let the kid know that, because he’d get his hopes up again. He tried to think about something else to say, to change the subject, but- _damn it!_ The kid was frowning, suddenly looking curious. Oh, he was way too smart to let this slide.

“How would you know that?”

Tony took a sip from his drink; panic racing through his veins rapidly.

“Know what?” _Bullshit_ , he already knew what Peter was referring to but he needed to play dumb if he was going to get out of this one.

“What you said about the churro…” there was a glint of hope in Peter’s eyes and the older man realized right there that he had figured it out. “How did you know?”

_Well, I listened to the messages because I can’t go a single day without hearing your voice or checking my phone a gazillion times to make sure you’re safe. Because I’m a selfish old bastard that cares way too much about you and I can’t stop myself…_

“I- I don’t remember.” _Nice saving, Tony_ , he thought sarcastically, resting the glass on a nearby surface because he was suddenly shaking again _._ “I guess Happy mentioned it. Look, forget about the flying vulture guy, _please_ …”

There was a hint of vulnerability in the way he pleaded.

“Why?” Peter asked, almost whining but in an angry sort of way. Not only because Tony was trying to change the subject but because he was genuinely tired of this patronizing attitude.

Tony could have answered that question easily: _because I can’t afford to loose you._ But he couldn’t say that, so he settled for an outburst of annoyed anger instead.

“Why? _Why_?! Because I said so!” The minute he raised his voice, he regretted it, because he could feel all the heads turning towards his direction. A woman approached him with a floral garland and Tony apologized while she hung it around his neck. “Sorry, sorry...” He took a deep breath to calm down, regain control of the situation. “Can’t you just be… a friendly neighborhood Spiderman?””

“But I’m ready for more than that now!”

Peter wanted to scream his lungs out in frustration. How was he ever going to prove to Tony that he wasn’t a kid if he wouldn’t _fucking_ let him? The older man narrowed his eyes behind the glasses.

“No, you’re _not_.”

“That is not what you thought when I took on Captain America.” Peter knew this one was a low blow and a subject way too close to the whole hotel room incident but _fuck it,_ he was angry.

As soon as the words left the kids mouth, a huge wave of guilt washed over Tony. He remembered the seemingly lifeless form of Peter lying on the ground at that airport and the utter panic he’d felt as he approached and kneeled by his side. How he’d grabbed the teen’s wrists when he’d panicked trying to fight back, thinking Tony was someone else. When he thought about how easily that day could’ve gone wrong…

He sighed.

“Trust me, kid, if Cap wanted to lay you out, he would’ve.”

Tony drank the rest of his drink in one gulp and walked to the entrance of the venue, where his yellow Audi was parked. This had been too close of a call. He wasn’t making any progress about his perverted obsession and he couldn’t look after the kid if he was hundreds of miles away. It was time to go home.

“Listen to me,” he said as he got into the car “if you come across these weapons again _call Happy_.”

The motor roared to life and Peter overheard it in the distance. He frowned.

“Are you _driving_?”

“You know,” Tony said casually ignoring the question “it’s never too early to start thinking about college. I got some pull at MIT. End call.”

“N- no! I don’t need to go to-”

Peter tried to answer but FRIDAY’s cold AI voice interrupted him.

“Mr. Stark is no longer connected.”

He watched as the suit flew away and even though he was extremely disappointed, he couldn’t help but feel impressed by the awesomeness of Tony’s tech.

____

 

“This is _so_ awesome.”

Ned looked at the projection in the palm of his hand, mesmerized. The guys from the van had been at the school, apparently searching for that glowy thingy Peter had picked up on his walk home from the lake. They still didn’t know what the heck it was, but Peter had managed to plant a spider-tracker on one of the bad guys and at least now they had their location.

He fell on the mattress next to his friend.

“I know, right?”

“So… we’re just tracking them?” Ned asked, eyes still fixed on the projection.

“Yep.”

“Does Iron Daddy know?”

Peter glared at him from the bed.

“No, he does _not_. And don’t call him that.”

“Ok, ok…”

There was a brief moment of silence in the bedroom, only broken by the low humming of the projector.

Peter could feel it, he could _sense_ that Ned’s twisted mind wheels were turning. He looked askance at his friend, who’s grin was getting wider by the second.

“…Iron Dick Daddy?”

“Oh my _God_ , dude! Seriously, stop it with the pervy nicknames!” Peter covered his face with his hands in embarrassment.

Ned chuckled watching his friend squirm in the bottom bunk bed. The projector beeped lowly and both of them returned their attention to the floating blue image.

“They’re in Brooklyn.” Peter said watching the small Spiderman logo blinking on the 3D map.

They stayed like that in Peter’s room, eating chips and monitoring the movements of the tracker on the map. Ned asked about the night he’d left the party and Peter told him everything, including the bit about Tony pulling him out of the lake.

“So he’s tracking the suit?”

“Yeah, apparently.”

Ned had with a meaningful grin on his face.

“He cares about you.”

Peter sighed, hanging upside down from the top bunk and reaching out to grab a Dorito from the bag sitting next no Ned.

“Right, he cares so much that he’s leaving the city” he said in a mocking tone, his words coated with resentment.

“Dude, considering you have like freaky Spider senses it’s incredible how unperceptive you can be.”

Peter looked at him puzzled and frowned. Ned sighed at his friend’s obliviousness.

“He’s obviously trying to stay away from you on purpose _because_ he’s into you!” Peter’s brows went up in sarcastic disbelief. “Look, let’s do a quick recap here. You guys met, you made out but he found out making out with you could get him in jail, so he backed out. Then took you to Germany to fight with him and when you threw yourself at him” Peter blushed at this “he couldn’t resist you. Then he had to leave the frickin’ country because _he can’t resist you,_ and even while being away he can’t help keeping an eye on you. The guy is obviously into you!”

Peter reflected on what his friend said. Mr. Stark said he enjoyed it when they made out, so he must have been attracted to him. He also said that it _couldn’t_ happen again, but not that he didn’t _want_ it to happen again. Then there was the churro thing he’d let slip out and the fact that he appeared out of nowhere when he’d been in trouble, which meant he was still checking on him even when he was away. But then there was the “you’re a child” and “stay away from trouble” discourse he always gave him that drove Peter insane with frustration. Then it occurred to him… maybe if he could just _show_ him that he wasn’t a kid, that he could treat him like an adult, he’d let his walls down. And what better way to accomplish that than taking down a group of bad guys working in the black market selling alien weapons?

“I have to bring these guys in. Then he will _have_ to stop treating me like a kid.”

“You’ll still be a kid” Ned cleverly pointed out.

“Yeah, a kid who can stop a car with his bare hands and take down criminals!”

“First of all, that’s crazy dangerous and completely the opposite of what he told you to do. And second of all, even if you make it out alive you’ll still be sixteen, dude, and still illegal.”

“I’ve kept Spiderman a secret, though, haven’t I?” Peter whispered conspicuously, completely disregarding the first part of Ned’s sentence.

“Against my deepest wishes, yeah.”

“Then I could keep us a secret as well.”

Ned looked definitely unconvinced by his friend’s master plan to get into Tony Stark’s pants by exposing himself to being killed and or injured by a bunch of guys with weapons powered by alien glowy thingys, but he knew better than to fight him over it. Peter could be stubborn as hell.

The projector beeped again and they both turned their attentions to it.

“They stopped.”

Peter frowned when he saw the location displayed on the map. “Maryland?”

“What’s there?”

“I don’t know” he sighed. “Evil lair?”

“They have a lair?”

“Dude, a gang with alien guns run by a guy with wings?” Peter snorted “Yeah, they have a lair.”

“Badaaass…” Ned nodded in agreement, then looked puzzled. “But how are you gonna get there if it’s like, three hundred miles away?”

There was a pause and they turned their heads in perfect synchronization towards the Academic Decathlon poster Peter had in his room. The Spider-boy turned to his friend with a mischievous grin on his face.

“It’s not far from D.C.”

___

 

It was way past noon when Tony woke up grunting, annoyed by the extremely loud ringing of his cellphone. He took the call and Happy’s chin came into view. Would this man _ever_ master technology?

“Hey, boss”

“This better be important, Happy, I was in the middle of something”

Tony rubbed his eyes and looked at all the trash still on the table from the take out he’d ordered the night before and the half-empty bottle of whiskey sitting next to it.

“I had a blip on my screen this morning, the kid has left New York.”

Stark sat up from the couch way too fast, the quick motion made his head spin and his body shiver. He grunted, pushing the small, tangled blanket away from his legs.

“Wha- to go where?”

“He’s got some school competition in D.C. I don’t think it’s a big deal but since you specifically asked that I’d keep you updated…”

“Yeah,” he squished his temple to relief some pain “yeah. Thanks, Happy.”

“Anytime.”

He hung up and tried to focus. God, he felt like shit. When he left India, his plane hadn’t even taken off and he was already pouring himself a glass of scotch and by the time they’d landed he was already pretty tipsy. It wasn’t the right choice, it shouldn’t have even been a choice at all, but damn it, he was doomed. All he wanted to do was sit in front of his screens and play the footage from the Baby Monitor on the kid’s suit. He wasn’t even looking for dirty bits like the one he’d found last time, he’d just been watching all of it. Except for the night of the lake, because that still gave him tachycardia. He knew it was creepy, but it was the closest thing to having the kid actually there with him. He asked FRIDAY to replay the last bit he’d been watching.

_“Hey everyone! Kick-ass party.”_

The room filled with the sound of his voice and Tony took a deep breath like it was oxygen. The image displayed Peter from his chest up with the Spiderman mask on, in his bedroom, facing a mirror and practicing ridiculous pick up lines.

_“Hey, what’s up Liz? Peter’s told me a lot about you.”_

The kid then winked and Tony felt something tighten in his stomach. He grunted in disgust and _then_ remembered why he’d gotten totally wasted the night before. What was his problem? He had pushed the kid away in every single way possible and now that he was showing what looked like a small interest in someone, someone his _own age_ , someone _appropriate_ for him, he was jealous? He was so full of bullshit. And he was probably going to hell. No, he definitely _was_ going to hell. Not that Tony really cared about that because if there was actually a God, he hated him with burning passion already.

_“It is I, Thor, son of Odin…”_

He gave the monitor a halfhearted smile. This kid was too pure and too good for this world and he had to be protected. Then he remembered Happy’s call and an unsettling feeling took over him.

“FRIDAY, show me the current location of the Spiderman suit.”

“Yes, boss.”

A small screen appeared next to the Baby Monitor footage displaying a satellite image, with a red dot blinking on it. It was moving fast on a road so he was probably in a vehicle, most likely a bus since it was a school trip. Tony’s stomach suddenly growled and he thought about getting up and having something to eat, but tiredness overpowered hunger. He laid back on the couch watching Peter being silly in front of the mirror and before he realized, he drifted back to sleep.

 

When he woke up, the sunlight entering through the floor-to-ceiling windows mercilessly hit his eyes like a punch so he closed them again in pain. With his right hand he blindly reached for his phone on the table, slapping around the surface until he felt the shape of the device. Shielding his face from the light with the other hand, he opened one eye and looked at the time in the screen: 12:43. He sat up from the couch and winced when his whole body screamed in pain, his muscles sore. He rubbed his eyes, the screen with the suit’s location that FRIDAY had put up for him the night before was still there. Tony frowned.

“Hey, FRI? Search for school competitions in Washington today.”

“Yes, boss” another screen popped up almost immediately. “There was one National Academic Decathlon Competition taking place in Washington D.C. today. It ended approximately half an hour ago and the winner was Midtown Tech.”

Tony looked at the bleeping red dot in the location screen. If the kid had already left the room, why was the suit still at the hotel…? Stark narrowed his eyes, suspicion and anger tying a knot in his stomach.

_He wouldn’t have *dared*…_

“FRIDAY, be a doll and get me the GPS location of Mr. Parker’s _cellphone_ …” he murmured, his tone dangerously low.

“Mr. Parker’s cellphone is currently right outside the Washington monument, sir.”

_Oh, that little sh-_

“News or footage. Keyword: Spiderman.”

Several tabs opened, jumping all over the screen. Just as he suspected. The image of Peter in the suit climbing the wall of the Washington monument appeared in front of him, apparently being recorded live by one of the bystanders. Tony greeted his teeth. That little minx had hacked the suit and taken out the goddamn _tracker_. He watched as the kid reached the top of the building and Tony’s heart skipped a bit.

_The chute._

He hadn’t reinstalled it. If the kid fell now, there was nothing between him and the floor but gravity. He was about to call for one of his suits, trying to calculate how much time it would take him to fly to D.C. with the thrusters at full power, when Peter jumped backwards in the air and used the police chopper to propel himself through one of the narrow windows. He sighed and the corner of his mouth twitched forming a small smile. The kid could be many things - reckless, too brave for his own good, stubborn… - but there was no denying that he was _smart._ Tony tried to stay angry with him but couldn’t help the feeling of pride spreading inside.

There were reports all over the afternoon news about Spiderman saving a group of students from New York from an elevator malfunction inside the Washington monument that could have dropped them to their early deaths. Tony waited what he thought was a proper amount of hours to send Peter a text.

___

 

Peter was already in the bus on his way back to New York when his phone vibrated. He glanced at the screen and his eyes went wide, grinning like an idiot.

 

_“We need to talk when you get back to NY. I’ll be at the Tower, swing by. - TS”_

 

He was back in New York and he wanted to _see_ him. He wanted to _talk._ Maybe he’d seen the news? Wait, was he alone in the Tower? A shiver of anticipation ran through Peter’s spine like an electric current. His mind immediately started playing a scene in Tony’s penthouse, Peter pinned to a wall while Mr. Stark devoured his mouth with avidness. Peter would moan and wrap his arms around the strong man’s neck, rolling his hips against him, desperate for some friction. Tony would be so gentle, taking the Spiderman suit off and laying him on a couch – or his bed -, kissing and licking all over his exposed flesh. Peter wouldn’t pass the chance to roam his hands all over Mr. Stark’s chest and back. (When had he undressed the man? Oh, well.) Then _Tony_ would finally reach for his underwear, slipping a hand through the waistband of his boxers and wrapping his calloused hand around Peter’s…

He suppressed a moan and his head snapped up, looking around to check if anyone had noticed the small whimper. Ned was snoring in the seat in front of his. Flash was fumbling with his phone. Liz was staring out the window, her expression blank, probably still shaken from the accident in the elevator. Cindy and Abe were talking to each other in whispers. Then his eyes landed on MJ, who was frowning at him over the cover of the book she was reading, her eyes narrowing in suspicion. Peter smiled awkwardly and she raised an eyebrow at him, but quickly lost interest and returned her glance to the pages. Peter sighed in relief, the hands in his lap pressed down as he squirmed in his seat, trying to adjust himself in his trousers. He had to get a grip on his crazy steamy fantasies if he was to confront Mr. Stark. He was quite sure that a boner like the one he was sporting now would be very noticeable in the Spiderman suit.

He looked out the window and stared at the dark road, a new uncomfortable feeling settling in his stomach that had little to do with arousal.

What if Tony was mad at him? What if the reason he wanted to talk to him was to lecture him _yet again_? He could hear the man’s voice in his head.

_‘What were you *thinking*?’_

_‘I thought I told you to stay out of trouble!’_

But this was different, right? His friends were in imminent danger! How was he supposed to stay out of it? Maybe he was mad about him following the bad guys… but it couldn’t be that because Tony couldn’t possibly know. He had ripped the tracker out of the suit, so all Mr. Stark could have seen was what was reported on the news.

He breathed deeply.

No, he had done the right thing. He was finally going to get the recognition he deserved. Mr. Stark would praise him for what he’d done today, for being so brave and _heroic_. Maybe he would realize that Peter was actually more capable and mature than he had thought. Then Peter would take his shot and tell him that he still wanted him and they could keep it a secret. No one had to know…

He smiled. This was it. The odds were in his favor for once.

___

 

Tony poured himself another glass of scotch – although he knew he shouldn’t, he was pretty tipsy already - and sat back down, glancing at his watch. It was almost midnight. He’d been over his speech in his head a thousand times, trying to balance it out so he wouldn’t come off too strong.

First, he would acknowledge the kid’s good work and quick thinking handling the elevator crisis. He could go ballistic over the fact that he’d hacked a multimillion-dollar suit but he didn’t want to be like his dad – _ugh_ \- and just crush him with negative criticism. Although the tampering with the suit’s tracker had to come up in the conversation. He couldn’t let him off the hook just because he had saved his classmates. He would bring it up and let the kid explain and apologize.

There was a knock on the window and it took Tony a couple of seconds to get out of his head and realize there was something stuck to it like a huge bug. He stood up from the armchair holding his glass of scotch in one hand, and went over to the window to slide it open. Peter gracefully landed on the floor and took off his mask.

“Hey, hi- Mr. Stark. Is everything ok? I was surprised when I got your text. But, like, in a good way, you know? Sorry it’s so late but I had to wait ‘til May fell asleep so I could sneak out and she was pretty shaken with what happened-” he stopped himself abruptly. “I mean, it’s not a big deal, I’m fine. Besides, she doesn’t even know I’m Spiderman so she’s just shaken because she thinks I was in the elevator- But everything’s fine! I’m fine. I’m-”

Tony just held up his hand, stopping the kid’s blabber. Peter was bright eyed and overexcited, a big smile across his face.

“I saw the footage. You did great, kid” he smiled. “I’m proud.”

Peter could feel his feet lifting off the ground, the praise making him feel like he was floating. His heart stretched with happiness from those words and his smile widened.

“Th-thank you, Mr. Stark.” His eyes fell to the ground as he twisted the mask in his hands.

“However,” Peter’s head snapped back up, his smile fading slightly “would you care to explain why your suit’s current location is a hotel room in Washington D.C.?”

The blood drained from the kid’s face and Tony could see the motion in his neck as he swallowed.

_Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck._

“Uh- eh, wher- what?”

Stark narrowed his eyes dangerously. _Do not play dumb with me, Parker._ He pulled his phone from his pocket and tilted it to the side, a blue glowing projection of a map with a red dot in it coming up from the screen.

“I said, _why_ is your suit’s current location showing up on _Washington_ , when you’re clearly standing right in front of me, in _New York_ , and you’re _wearing it_.”

_FUCK. FUCK. FUCK!_

Peter’s head was spinning. He had left the tracker on the goddamn lamp. _Stupid idiot!_

“I- uh…” Tony raised an eyebrow at him. “Well, I kind of… I took it out and-”

“Yeah, I assumed as much” Mr. Stark stuck his phone back in his pocket. He took a few steps forward, getting really close to the kid’s unblinking face. “But I’m not asking _how_ , I’m asking _why_.”

He was too close, way too close for Peter to be able to think straight. He needed to say something, anything. He couldn’t recoil and be lectured like a child.

“Well, well- because…” he took a deep breath, straightening his back in an attempt to look more composed _._ “Because tracking me without my permission is a huge violation of my privacy, actually.”

Tony’s eyebrows almost hit the ceiling. He took a step back like he’d been stabbed. Of course the kid had no idea what Tony had been doing, what he’d _watching_ , but the accusation stung nonetheless. Shame washed all over him, suddenly feeling attacked and exposed. Vulnerable. He panicked, so he reacted the way he always did when he felt attacked: he hit back.

“Oh, a violation of your _privacy,_ is it?” he clenched his jaw. “Well, maybe I wouldn’t have _had_ to put a tracker in your suit if you behaved like an _adult_ every once in a while.”

He went in for the kill, he knew exactly what that word did to Peter. He saw the kid’s nostrils flutter in anger and he knew he’d hit the spot.

“An _adult_?” Peter was crushing the mask in his hands, his body literally hot from the rage. “Like _you?_ ”

Tony’s mouth fell slightly open.

“ _What_?” he didn’t scream, it was more like a whisper. Peter took a step back because the look on the man’s face was absolutely terrifying. Maybe he’d crossed a line. Maybe…

 _No,_ he thought firmly, _you’re going to respect me once and for all. I’m not taking this bullshit anymore._

He raised his chin in defiance.

“You heard me” he kept his tone as low as Tony’s. If he lost his temper, he’d be proving Mr. Stark right and he was _done_ with being treated like a kid. “Do you think I don’t see right through this? Do you really believe I’m _that_ thick? You keep saying that I’m a kid because you _need_ to believe that.” He narrowed his eyes and stepped forward. To his astonishment, it was Tony who backed up this time. He felt bold, finally feeling like he had the upper hand for once. “I think you keep looking for reasons to label me as a ‘child’ because if I’m not, then you don’t have an excuse anymore. And when I actually _show_ you that I’m not,” he gritted his teeth “when I actually do something _right_ , like today, you quickly find a new reason to lecture me, to treat me like a baby. So you can keep running away from me. From _what you actually want_. You say I should behave like an _adult_ , but you’re the one who’s been acting like a _kid_ -”

The sound of the smack that landed on Peter’s cheek ringed in the air of the penthouse and the room filled with a heavy, still silence.

Peter suddenly stilled, his head turned to the side from the blow, mouth slightly opened and feeling the stinging burn on the skin where Tony’s hand had impacted. His eyes watered, not so much from the slap but from the humiliation. He could hear Tony’s ragged, rapid breathing in front of him. When he mastered the strength to order his body to move, he didn’t even look up. He couldn’t face him. Feeling the familiar burn in his eyes, he put the mask back on before the tears started to fall and ran to the window.

“Peter…” Tony called after him, his hand still mid air, shaking.

The boy did not look back. He jumped and shot a web, swinging away.

Tony looked at the palm of his hand and closed his eyes, the tears that had been pooling there finally falling.

“Pete...”

_What have I done?_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You know I don't consume food, I only feed on comments lol so any feedback from you guys is always highly appreciated. I do this for and because of you, so I love to hear what you guys have to say. Thanks for reading and hope you enjoyed it (it's a little longer than usual, to make up for the delay in the update). 
> 
> Love you! xx


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tony gets much needed help and now it's Peter's turn to do something stupid.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> You're all way too nice and you were so amazing with your comments in the last chapter.  
> Infinite thanks to **Sthefy** for offering to beta this. Eres un cielo  <3!  
> Also a huge thank you to one of the most amazing people I've met in the fandom, **Lily (im-a-goner-foryou)** for her reassurance and enthusiasm.  
>  This chapter is dedicated to **sluttystaker** , for being awesome and being there for me when I rant. xx

 

 _“Peter_...” _pause “I… I don’t know what to say. That was unforgivable. I- It's… I’m so sorry. Please call me back?”_

Beep.

 

 _“Hey, hi. It's… It’s me again. Look_ , _I have no excuse, I really don't. I'm not going to even try to… Please, Peter, I’m so sorry.”_

Beep.

 

_“Pete? I know you´re upset. You have every right to be, but please… What can I do to make this right? I'm sorry. It's- It's Tony. Again.”_

Beep.

 

_“Hi. Not sure if you got that package I sent over? I hope the phone is the one you wanted, I knew the old one’s screen was cracked… And you can use the tablet for school. Anyway, I- I hope you like it.”_

 

Beep.

 

_“I just wanted to let you know that… It’s not like I’m trying to buy your forgiveness or anything, it’s just…” sigh. “Peter, please? I’m really bad at this stuff. I’m so sorry. Please, tell me, what can I do?”_

Beep.

 

_“I…” broken voice “Are you at least listening to these?” there was a long pause “Do you hate me, Peter?” he sounded in tears. “You should. You really should…”_

Beep.

 

Peter sighed and threw his phone on the bedside table. He’d just gotten another package with a bunch of Star Wars Lego sets. There was no note or message but he knew exactly whom it was from. He pursed his lips in anger. What was this? The equivalent of a bouquet of roses from the asshole husband to his poor wife?

_I never cared about your money. I cared about *you*._

It had been a week since the last time he’d seen Mr Stark and since then he had received at least 80 text messages, 30 missed calls and 3 emails. He was very aware that the man knew he had screwed up but something in him felt broken. Peter had reflected on that night quite a lot. He got to the Tower, Tony let him in, he told him ‘I’m proud’, he confronted him about taking out the tracker and then Peter snapped and rambled about Mr Stark running away from him and being a kid and then…

He subconsciously lifted his hand to his cheek. It hadn’t really even hurt that much but the shame… the humiliation he felt. There he was, making a grand speech about him not being a child and then getting slapped like a little boy who’s misbehaved.

Besides, wasn’t Tony an _adult_? Then why hadn’t he used some motherfucking words instead of his hand if he felt offended? What an ass!

Peter looked at his table, where the unopened box containing the brand new phone rested alongside the one with the tablet. He didn’t want gifts. He wanted an apology.

_He’s trying to apologize, though…_

Those lame voicemails weren’t apology enough! He deserved something else. Something bigger.

_Like what?_

He briefly daydreamed about Tony pulling up in one of his cars to pick him up from school. He’d reluctantly go into the car and he’d act tough at first but then Tony would tell him that he was sorry – and he would see in his eyes he really meant it -, that he’d never do something like that ever again and he’d been wrong treating him like a kid. That would make Peter ease up a bit and he would ask Tony to come clean about how he felt and what he wanted. Tony would tell him that he did want him and cared about him – deeply -, so Peter would sort of forgive him and Tony would take them someplace nice for dinner, like a date, to make it up to Peter and they would go somewhere peaceful later, watching the sunset together and make out until his lips were sore and red and-

_That’s corny and just plain ridiculous. And besides, he slapped you, for Christ’s sake! You’re still thinking about grinding against his thigh like a purring cat? What the hell is wrong with you!_

He sighed. He wanted to be more furious at Mr Stark than what he was, he really did, but he couldn’t. Aside from the fact he was completely in love with the man, a part of him knew- even a week ago when he was standing in front of him, delivering his cocky little speech – that Mr Stark had the right to be mad about him tinkering with the suit. It was a very expensive, very sophisticated piece of tech and he had made it especially for him. Even Ned had been against altering it at the time. He was very aware what he had done was wrong but still that wasn’t an excuse to slap him! He could have been mad, lecture him, even – God forbid - take the suit back, but not _hit_ him!

_You know that’s not the reason why he slapped you…_

He remembered how brave he’d felt when Tony had taken a step back, like he was the lion stalking a prey. For once in their relationship, he felt he was in charge, calling the shots.

_You knew he was about to snap and you kept pushing anyway…_

Peter shook his head, mad at his own line of thinking. No, this was _not_ his fault! No freaking way. Didn’t Mr Stark always say that _he_ was the adult? The one who should know better? Well, then even if Peter had been a little pushy – _you were more than a little p… -_ he should have known _better_! End of story!

He angrily shoved his broken old phone in his backpack and left the apartment. He kept frowning all the way to school.

 

* * *

 

“Oh my God, Tony!”

Pepper looked around in utter dismay. The penthouse was a complete and utter mess. The floor was covered in broken bits of _stuff_ – Pepper couldn’t even begin to figure out what it had been before -, the glass coffee table in the middle of the room had been smashed to pieces, a couple of armchairs were knocked down, like they had been kicked around and the screens where Tony used to work were out. She didn’t recall ever seeing those screens turned off. _Ever._ Tony was always working on something or other. She walked, careful not to step on anything, - as if that was even possible! – over to the large couch and she couldn’t repress the grimace.

Tony was lying there, barely covered by an obviously dirty blanket. There were _way_ too many empty bottles around him and no sign of food whatsoever. His beard was untamed, like it had been a few days since he’d had it trimmed. And, oh dear Lord, the _smell_. He grunted when she leaned over and gave him a little nudge to wake him up.

“Huh?” he opened his eyes slightly and looked around, as if he didn’t quite know where he was.

“God, Tony, what the hell happened here?” Pepper was still looking around in disbelief.

“Wh- Pepper?” he tried to move up from the couch and fell back down rapidly.

“Yes, _Pepper_. I can’t believe... Look at this!” she waved her hands around and then pointed at him “Look at _you_!”

He grunted again, annoyed.

“That’s something I’ve been actively trying to avoid-”

“Well, you better stop avoiding it. You’re a mess!”

This time Tony did manage to stand up into a seating position, resting his elbows on his knees and holding his head in his hands. He didn’t even look at her when he responded.

“Is this why you’re here? To tell me what a fucking failure I am?” he said, his voice bitter and weak. “Too late. I already know. And I don’t _care._ ”

He stood up, almost tripped over the blanket and walked barely straight towards the bar. Pepper pursed her lips in annoyance and ran after him, putting herself between the man and the counter.

Tony looked at her with vague eyes. There was something dark in them and when he spoke, his voice sent a shiver down Pepper’s spine.

“Get out of the way.”

She frowned at him, paralyzed. Who the hell was this man?

“Tony?” she whispered, almost tentatively because she had never seen him this far gone. “Tony… this” she tipped her head towards the racks stacked with bottles “isn’t the answer.”

He took a second and sighed, tired, but didn’t move.

“There _is_ no answer, Potts. There’s no coming back from this.”

A silence fell between them. She had managed to steady her breathing by the time she spoke.

“Whatever it is” she took a step forward and placed a gentle hand on his arm “we’ll figure it out.”

Even though he was pretty out of it, Tony _felt_ it. She was _shaking_. Her hand was _shaking_. She was scared. Scared of _him_.

Then all the memories he had been trying to get away from came back like a blinding white light. His pulse rising, his blood boiling, the shame, the exposure… and his hand landing on Peter’s face. He could still _hear_ the smack; he could still _feel_ the tingling in the skin on his hand from the blow and he could still _taste_ the booze in his mouth. For a split second he heard her mom’s voice, high-pitched and panicked, _‘Howard!’_ and the same smacking sound ringed through his head…

He closed his eyes in pure and heart-breaking pain, a feeling of intense disappointment running through him like a thick fluid that enveloped him and drowned him.

The realization hit hard and before he could help it, he felt his stomach clenching and the hot liquid bursting out of his esophagus. He managed to turn his head in time and not throw vomit all over Pepper, who reacted quickly stepping aside but kept her hand steady on his arm.

“Oh my God, Tony!” she looked around and grabbed a cloth that was sitting behind the counter. “When was the last time you ate anything?”

When Tony managed to stop, she handed him the cloth and he pressed it to his mouth.

“I… I don’t know.”

 

He had watched her as she brewed a teapot and fixed him a quick sandwich. He had insisted on doing it himself, but Pepper practically threw him on the couch raising a firm index finger in his direction. _‘Stay there’_. While she’d been doing it, Tony had time to wonder _how the hell_ did someone like Pepper Potts ever put up with him. She was so put together, so fiercely intelligent, so elegant and so confident… She was clearly exceeding at life while he was failing _miserably_. People always thought that Tony Stark was full of it: a daddy’s boy, filthy rich, arrogant ass. The truth was Tony Stark had huge insecurities, mainly because of his father, who hadn’t always been his biggest fan. In fact, he’d always made him feel like he wasn’t enough, that he was a big disappointment. The truth was Tony Stark was filthy rich but he would gladly trade his fortune in the blink of an eye to have his mom back, even for just a second. The truth was Tony Stark could come off as arrogant but he was always second guessing himself, even if he didn’t show it. The truth was Tony Stark unconsciously pushed people like Pepper Potts away because he _knew_ he wasn’t good enough for them.

_And that’s why you keep pushing * **him** * away too and you kn-_

He shook his head. He wasn’t ready to face that yet.

Pepper gave him the dish with the sandwich and carefully placed one mug of tea next to her feet on the floor – since the table was nothing more than a pile of shattered glass - and she held the other one between her hands.

She didn’t speak, watching carefully how Tony munched on the sandwich. Once the food started to go in, his stomach awakened and growled, hungry for more. When he was done devouring the sandwich, he looked at the mug in Pepper’s hand and she didn’t need the words, she passed it on to him and grabbed the other one.

_You know me so well…_

He took a sip.

“I’m assuming Happy called…” it wasn’t even a question, Tony already knew. Sadly, there was no one other than Hogan around who would actually care.

“He was worried, Tony. And-” she didn’t want to finish the sentence with ‘with good reason’, so she settled for “And he told me you weren’t even picking up your phone anymore.”

Tony quickly took it out of his pocket. Even though the hopes of seeing a message from Peter were long gone by now, he still felt disappointment when he glanced at the screen and saw nothing.

“I- I didn’t really want to… talk.”

_Or eat, or think, or *be*._

“Tony...” she placed her mug on the floor. “Please, _please,_ tell me what’s going on.”

While looking at her pleading eyes, he realized he wanted to. He wanted to tell someone, to get it off his chest, to vent and finally be rid of it. But he couldn’t. He couldn’t tell her about… what he had done… without her immediately a) being outraged and b) asking why. And to explain why, he would have to explain what the hell had been going through his mind. And that was just… he couldn’t tell Pepper _that_. So he settled for ambiguity.

“I- I hurt someone.”

He could feel the couch shifting slightly as Pepper’s body went stiff and her eyes darted around the room. Tony almost chuckled.

“Oh, _come on_ , Pepper. No, there’s not a body lying around somewhere.”

“I never said that” she half smiled, but he immediately noticed her posture loosening up. “Who?”

“What?”

“Who did you hurt? How?”

_Shit._

He took the mug to his lips and drank some tea; carefully avoiding his ex’s gaze. He was stalling and Pepper was fully aware, but she knew better than to be pushy. Tony didn’t do well with ‘pushy’.

How on Earth was he going to explain this without actually revealing too much? He made sure to keep his eyes glued to the mug. There was a chance that Pepper could read his soul through them at this point in their relationship and he wasn’t about to take that risk.

“When the whole mess with the Avengers went down I- I recruited this… _guy_ -”

Pepper narrowed her eyes.

“Oh, that? I _know_.”

Tony looked up, his blood frozen in his veins. He could feel his body suddenly going cold in panic. He swallowed hard and waited for the inevitable blow.

“I mean, Happy kind of kept me posted” when she clarified, Tony actually realized he’d been holding his breath and let out a sigh that thankfully went unnoticed. “I didn’t mean to pry or anything, I have enough on my plate as it is, but-” she looked like she was going to add something else but decided not to. “Anyway, yeah, I know you took a _sixteen year old_ from Queens to fight a bunch of highly trained super-soldiers and _lied_ to his legal guardian in order to do so. Go on.”

She was trying to be nice about it, Tony noticed, but you can’t take the Pepper out of Pepper. It was painfully obvious by the pursing of her lips and her exasperated sigh at the end of her sentence that she found it incredibly irresponsible and _wrong_.

_As any normal adult would._

If she was already struggling to contain her disapproval, what would her reaction be to the rest? He quickly realized that this conversation could only end badly. So he cleverly backpedalled.

“Look, the thing is it got really intense with Steve. Also, Rhodey got hurt...”

She closed her eyes and looked away, placing a soft hand on his forearm.

“I know” when he met her gaze, her eyes were watery. “But that was not your fault, Tony. It was a _fight_. Anyone could have been hurt.” She sighed and suddenly her tone became annoyed. “If you ask me, this one’s on Rogers.”

_Wow._

He wanted to mask his surprise but he failed miserably. She kept going.

“I get that giving the government control over the Avengers was a risky thing and it should’ve been carefully considered, but there was collateral damage to what you guys were doing and it was just a matter of time before somebody called you out” Tony was beyond puzzled. It seemed like she’d been doing more than just checking up on him, she’d been following the situation closely. “For once in your life, Tony, you did the responsible thing. This is _not_ on you.”

She smiled softly, reassuring him by squeezing his arm fondly.

_‘This is not on you.’_

Suddenly the heavy weight of those five words came crushing down on him.

_‘This is not on you.’_

It was ridiculous but as soon as those words left Pepper’s mouth, he felt something lifting away. Something he hadn’t even realized he had been holding on to.

_‘This is not on you.’_

The words felt like a balm, washing over him, healing a part of him.

_‘This is not on you.’_

So many things in the past he felt had been _on him_. Disappointing his dad, not saying goodbye to her mom when he had the chance, Yinsen – _‘don’t waste it. Don’t waste your life’_ -, Coulson in the Helicarrier, Aldrich turning into a monster, Maya getting shot, Pepper… Pepper being tortured with Extremis, Cap’s words in his vision - _‘you… could have… saved… us’_ -, Ultron and Sokovia, the Avengers splitting in half, Zemo…

_‘This is not on you.’_

“Tony…”

Too many things were on him already.

“Tony?”

_I can’t add Peter to that list. Peter cannot be ‘on me’. Ever._

“Tony!”

By the time he snapped out of it, he realized there were tears falling down his cheeks and Pepper was looking at him with a worried look on her face.

“Are you okay? Would- would you like some more food?” she ran a hand through her forehead, pushing her loose bangs away. “I feel like you need some more food.”

The corner of his lips twitched sadly in what felt like a sorry attempt at a smile, tears still fresh on his skin. He knew that gesture so well…

_‘With olives… Lots of olives... At least three olives.’_

He wasn’t hungry but it didn’t matter. He watched as Pepper took out her phone and ordered food. He couldn’t see the screen but he knew what she was ordering.

_‘I’ve been in captivity for three months, there are two things I want to do: I want an American cheeseburger…’_

He felt the skin on his cheeks stretch awkwardly. He realized to his surprise that he was actually smiling a little and it suddenly dawned on him that he hadn’t done that in a while.

 

In the course of a few hours, Pepper had managed to get him to eat, forced him to take a shower, called Tony’s personal barber to give him a much needed grooming, got him out of his sweatpants and into a clean set of clothes and arrange for someone to come clean up the penthouse. He already felt like the clouds were a little less dense and the air much more breathable.

_Give this woman a cell phone and Internet access and she could rule the goddamn world._

“I’m taking you upstate” she said firmly while grabbing her purse.

Tony panicked. He couldn’t leave New York now, not when he hadn’t been able to contact the kid yet.

“I’d rather stay here, Pep. I-”

“It wasn’t a question” she cut him off quickly. “You need to be around people, Tony. Whenever you’re alone, you get insanely self destructive and I refuse to walk in here again and find you in _that_ state ever again.” He lowered his head, partly annoyed that she was right and partly ashamed by the fact that she _was_ right. She softened her tone. “Look… I don’t know _exactly_ everything that’s going through your mind right now but I can promise you this: you will _not_ be able to take care of any problems unless you can take care of yourself first. And you’re terrible at that.” She gave him a half-smile. “So listen to me, _please_. Come to the compound, Rhodey is still there doing therapy. Help him out, that will give you an excuse to behave like a normal human being - at least your version of one - and _then_ when you get a grip you´ll start solving whatever problems you have. _One at a time_.”

He silently nodded. She was, once again, completely right. It wouldn’t solve anything to get in touch with the kid if he didn’t get his shit together first. He owed him that much.

They left the Start Tower in the company’s car she’d used to get there. The driver took Pepper to the airport – she gave him a soft kiss in the cheek before she stepped out of the car - and afterwards dropped him off at the compound. He was starting to regret it, all the memories from the team coming back to him when he walked through the halls, until he saw Rhodey. He was working with a physiotherapist, who was guiding him while he grabbed two long bars to each side of his hips, trying to walk while suspended on a sort of harness. They hugged and talked, laughed and joked darkly about Rhodey’s condition, and then Tony’s mind sparked to live with an idea, so he quickly left for his shop.

Pepper was always right: solve one problem at a time. He was a mechanic after all, that’s what he did. He _fixed_ things.

 

* * *

 

Peter was picking on the bread of his sandwich at the cafeteria, Ned’s voice drowned out by his own thoughts. It had been four days without a single message from Mr Stark.

The boy hadn’t answered any of the texts or returned his calls, but still he felt a little hurt. Had he given up? Was he giving Peter space? Was he mad that Peter had completely ignored his pleas?

“Dude! Earth to Peter!”

He lifted his head from the tray and looked at the source of the voice. Ned’s expression was a mix between annoyed and worried.

“Sorry…” Peter apologized. _Great, now I’m a lousy friend too?_

“What the heck is going on? You’ve been really out of it these days.”

Peter sighed and leaned a bit closer to his friend, lowering his voice to a minimum.

“He stopped.”

“Huh?”

“Ton- _Mr Stark_. He stopped.”

“Peter, we’re in the middle of the school cafeteria and it’s lunch time. I wouldn’t even be able to hear a SWAT team bursting in with a tank. Speak up!”     

He rolled his eyes.

“He stopped calling!” he yelled in frustration, turning his gaze back to the sandwich.

“Oh. _Oh!_ ” Ned gave him a knowing look. He paused, thinking. “Well… he couldn’t keep trying to contact you forever, could he? You didn’t answer so he got the message. Isn’t it what you wanted?”

Peter’s eyes flew open in disbelief.

“Wha- No! Of course not!”

“Then what did you want?”

 _Payback_ , a vicious little voice said in his head. He wanted Tony to crawl on his hands and knees. He wanted him to feel the humiliation he had felt. He knew he would have eventually forgiven him, but he wanted to play hard to get because he thought he deserved a little bit of… consideration? He wanted to feel like Tony actually _wanted_ him in his life. That’s why he was bit ashamed to admit he had been enjoying Tony’s desperation to contact him. He also immediately realized how dark and wrong that would sound so he gave his friend an edulcorated version of his twisted thoughts.

“Gee, I don’t know, for him to make a bit of an effort, maybe?” he said bitterly.

“Penis Parker and his Pet Leech looking cosy!”

Flash was standing in front of their table with a big grin on his face.

“What do you want, Flash?” Ned was very aware that his friend was in _no_ mood to deal with their classmate today, so he tried to get rid of him as fast as possible.

“Whoa, a bit salty, don’t you think, Neddy?” he winked and Ned rolled his eyes “I’m throwing a party this Friday to celebrate, you know, our epic win at the Decathlon and getting out of that elevator alive” he narrowed his eyes at Peter. “Although technically you weren’t a part of any of those events, Parker, I’m a merciful host so you may come as Ned’s date.”

Peter daydreamed about standing up and punching that irritating smirk off his classmate’s face, the energy of which would most likely send him off into the wall at the end of the cafeteria and possibly even damage the structure of the building. He knew better than to actually _do_ that, though.

“Thanks, Flash, but no” he was gritting his teeth.

“Oh, what’s the matter, Parker? Too much work at the Stark Internship?” Flash mocked him viciously, not really knowing how well he was aiming his blow. “What are you doing lately, picking restaurants for Stark’s dates with Pepper Potts? Does he make you pick up her dry-cleaning, too?”

Peter frowned.

“Not that is any of your business, but Mr Stark’s not dating anyone.” He couldn’t help adding bitterly in his mind: _I wish *I* was, but apparently I’m not exactly dating material._

Flash’s eyes lit maliciously, like he’d just found a very valuable treasure and he was going to keep it all to himself. He took his time to reply, savouring the resentment in Peter’s eyes.

“Well that’s just sad, Parker. If you’re gonna lie about working for Stark, at least have the decency to keep up with the news.” He took out his phone and did a quick search, handing the device over to Peter with a triumphant expression.

Peter took a quick look and his stomach twisted violently.

It was an article from one of those trashy gossip magazines – why on Earth was Flash going through one of those might have been a good question, but it didn’t matter to Peter at the moment – and it said in big, bold letters at the top:

 

**TONY STARK AND PEPPER POTTS REKINDLE THEIR FLAME?**

 

Underneath the headline there were several pictures taken from a pretty long distance of Tony and Pepper in front of the Stark Tower building and getting into a black Audi. He was hugging her and holding her hand.

Peter dropped the phone on the table like it was burning his skin.

 

“Peter?”

Ned entered the bathroom, looking around. It was the third one he inspected and he still hadn’t found him. His friend had left the cafeteria with the speed of a lightning bolt, leaving Flash with an amused but suspicious expression on his face and Ned with the uncomfortable task of avoiding his pressing questions about Peter’s reaction.

He heard a small sob coming from one of the bathroom stalls.

“Peter, is that you?”

“Hey, uh- Just gimme a second, will ya?”

He heard the toilet paper roll and break, and the unmistakable sound of someone blowing their nose, hard. When Peter came out, his face was puffy and blushed and his eyes were watery and reddish, but Ned was a good friend so he said absolutely nothing about it and just stood there, patiently waiting for Peter to decide he was ready to talk.

He watched silently as he splashed cold water on his face and then just kept his head down and gripping the sink’s sides with his hands.

“That’s why he stopped. He got back together with her, so I no longer matter.”

Ned wanted to tell him that that wasn’t the only logical explanation – although it was a possibility – but he felt that the last thing his friend needed now was someone trying to cheer him up with elaborated theories on why Mr Stark wasn’t blowing up his phone with voicemails and texts anymore. What his friend needed now was ranting, getting everything out. So he waited and listened.

But Peter didn’t say anything else because his explanation was so crushingly adequate that he just… he didn’t need to say nothing else. He felt empty for a moment and then a fire-like rage spread through him. After what seemed like a lifetime, he rose up from the sink and looked at Ned, something wild in his eyes.

“And we’re going to that party.”

 

* * *

 

When Rhodey lifted his cards for the first time, Tony inspected his friend’s face. Eyes forward, expression blank, lips in a perfect straight line, cheeks unmoving.

Playing poker with James was a nightmare. He never gave a single hint.

His friend kept his face expressionless when he took one of the chips and stacked it on top of the blind.

“What? You’re only calling it?” Tony hadn’t even glanced at his cards, but he loved the irritated look on Rhodey’s face when he played with that overconfident arrogance. He threw his chips on the table. “I’m gonna raise that. I like my hand, colonel.”

“You haven’t even _seen_ your hand yet.”

“I’ve always been a lucky guy.”

“Yeah, no kiddin’”

He called it again. Tony vigorously rubbed his hands.

“Okay… gimme a good flop!”

Rhodey rolled his eyes in annoyance and turned over three cards from the deck on the middle of the table: Jack of spades, 4 and 6 of hearts.

“How about a hundred?” Tony threw in another chip and watch in amusement when his friend sighed. “What are you gonna do about that, darling?”

Rhodey called it again and moved on to the turn card: Queen of spades.

Tony quickly raised another thousand.

“There’s no shame in folding, Rhodes.”

He was laughing at the grunt his friend have him in return when he felt his phone vibrating against the table. He flipped it and his heart missed a bit when he saw the name on the screen.

“Gotta take this” he stood up from the chair like it was burning hot. “No peeping!” he added, pointing at his cards.

He ran to an empty room and breathed in deeply before swiping his thumb over the screen and taking the call.

“Hello?”

 _“Oh… Hello there, *Mr Stark*. L-lost”_ he hiccupped “ _my number?_ ”

“Peter?” Tony frowned. “Are you ok?”

The kid hiccupped again.

 _“I’m daaaandy!”_ he was slurring. Fuck, was he _drunk_? _“Just wanted to k-know… how’s it goin’ with Ms. Potts? She´s no kid, huh?”_

What the fuck? Did he just say ‘Ms Potts’? Why would he ask about Pepper? He was screaming over some really loud, really annoying music and there were other voices around.

“Peter” he sighed, “where are you?”

 _“A paaaar-teeeeey. Not that you care though, right?”_ something shattered, sounded like glass. _“Shit! Uh- so you been well, yeah? I haven’t.”_

Tony frowned as he pinched the bridge of his nose. Ok, he had been a teenager too – although he was kind of sad that the kid’s friends were the kind that would let him drink and dial. He decided he was going to handle this with patience. Like he should have the last time.

“You haven’t? Why is that?”

“ _I’m tired… And I deserve an apology… And I’m not kid!_ ”

“Peter, I’m sorry about what happened-”

“ _Maybe I should find someone here… someone who *wants* me…_ ”

Tony held his breath. Oh God, no.

“Listen,” he had to literally bite his tongue to stop the immediate ‘kid’ that would have followed that word “you’re drunk and in no position to make that kind of decision. _Go. Home_. We can talk tomorrow if you want.”

“ _I don’t want to talk! I want you to see me… like something else! I’m not a kid! I’m not! I can prove it. I will go” he hiccupped again “f-find someone and- and I’m gonna let him fuck me and then I won’t be a kid anymore and you will *want* me-_ ”

“Enough!” he slammed his fist on the wall next to him. The revolting image of a very drunk Peter getting thrown on a mattress in a random room and a stranger behind him chasing only his own pleasure was rapidly forming in his head and crushing his lungs. _Don’t lose your cool, Stark._ He forced himself to take a deep breath. “I- If you do something rush right now, you’re gonna regret it tomorrow, Peter. Please, for once in your life, listen to me: stop drinking and _go home_.”

“ _I don’t have to take orders from you! I’m done ta- taking orders and being all yes Mr Stark, sure Mr Stark, whatever you want Mr Stark_ ” Peter was speaking fast and incoherently. “ _I…”_ when he spoke again, it sounded like he was pressing the phone to right to his mouth _“I wanted it to be you, y’know?_ ” he paused, hesitation clear in his voice. “ _I wanted you to be the first. My first…_ ”

Tony’s eyes clenched shut. His heart ached at that. Shit.

“Peter…” this could not be happening right now. “We’ve been over this, Pete-”

 _“I sh-should hate you, y’know? I should hate you and I hate you... T- tell me, though… why not me, huh?”_ he sounded whiny and on the verge of tears. “ _Am I ugly? I’m stupid? Was I so… so bad wh-when I sucked you off? Why won’t… why don’t you-_ ”

Peter’s voice was cut off and there was a loud series of noises. Tony muttered a very bad language word under his breath. His hands were trembling. He was very close to a panic attack: he could feel it in the rhythm of his breath, the burn in his throat and the savage beating of his heart against his chest.

“Peter? Peter! Are you there?”

A few agonizing seconds later, he heard the kid’s low voice, almost whispering.

“ _Mr Stark? I… I don’t feel so good.”_

 _That’s it._ Tony was already walking out of the room when he started talking.

“Peter, stay there, I’m going to pick you up. Please, _stay there._ ”

He made FRIDAY trace the call and popped back in the other room to tell Rhodey that he had to leave, it was urgent. He would explain later. _No, I won’t._ Tony practically ran to the garage and took the fastest car he had, leaving a black indentation in the ground when he hit the gas and left the compound, heading for New York.

___

Rhodey was picking up the remains of their unfinished poker game and couldn’t help himself. Looking around, wary – as if someone would suddenly come in and catch him red handed - he lifted Tony’s cards.

Pair of Queens. _That lucky bastard._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed this and know that I'm already working on the next one - which I'm struggling a little with, but I'll get there, I promise. As always, your comments and kudos are everything to me and I appreciate them immensely, but I have to ask you to *please* be positive with your feedback. I put my soul and heart in what I write, and I understand it's not going to appease everyone, but if you feel the need to leave a mean or negative comment, please don't. :)
> 
> Love you all and thanks for reading! xx


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